I don’t know how to do discipline right.

I know I need balance in life, but I can’t help but oscillate between extremes: either I lose myself in experiences, creation, imagination or I work myself to the bone to the point I question what I’m even doing this for.

I am a student. When I focus on my duties, I immerse myself in it the whole day. I stop liking anything. I abandon all my healthy hobbies and the only thing I can do in the free time I put aside to myself is scroll.

It’s a constant pendulum and I have to admit, I love the highs. But it’s not sustainable and I don’t know what to do. I often wonder about what I really want and what society makes me feel like I lack. I don’t know if I’m explaining it right, but I’ll use an example: do I feel like I need to work out everyday because I want to, or because society tells me I need to be fit to be worth something? Do I actually want to be productive all day or is it the pressure of soul-sucking capitalism?

I’ve tried to become more disciplined. It hasn’t worked too well. Maybe my approach or goal was wrong. I think I may need gentle guidance rather than a stifling rigid system. For any one of you that has implemented something like this, how did you go about it? Do you have any tips for balancing creativity and discipline?

Hi. A very indisciplined person here. I have been listening at Elizabeth Filips (youtuber) advice on how to have a "Consistently Successful Life" , since I seem not to be able to stick to habits or routines. Her approach resonates a lot with me, but I am still not able to apply it in my life. I am new to this Reddit and have notices that the approach towards discipline is very "classic", so I would love here your thoughts about these Filips' concepts, if you are familiar with them.

Thanks.

What if you keep pushing. You ignore the feelings of resistance. You surprise everyone around you. You start living to not quit.

You keep moving. You keep grinding and improving. You stop caring.

What if this time you don't fail. You stick to that diet forever. You always take action. You set time in the end of the day to enjoy what you have done.

Think about it. What if you throw out and ditch all modern weak advice of today and you just do it your way. You follow your ego. You follow your rules.

What if you actually set a a solid plan and stick to it. Everytime you think about quitting, you break that shell that is preventing from upgrading to your next version and you move out of those weak pathetic thoughts and you continue pushing beyond your limits.

After months.. you decided to take a walk to rest off. You go out, and start walking, walking full of pride and positive extreme field of energy, attracting everyone around, each person you pass by senses your hardwork and relentless commitment. You breath, and each breath shows the pain and suffering you went through.

Marcus Aurelius told us to be hard on ourselves, a lot of other emperors said the same.

I am one of those people who will keep trying to do the extreme and fail but get up and try again.

I don't care about social life or enjoying the present moment.

I don't workout because I want big muscles like I was once.

I want to work out because I want to prove to myself that I have control over my mind. I am unstoppable.

I am sorry guys, but I am doing it the extreme way again.

I want to prove to myself that I can win.

And I will do that.

A few years ago, I realized that I could do anything whenever I wanted. I was so rational and ignored my emotional reasoning (in a good way). I could study or work out when I felt lazy. I could bring myself to do anything. I felt powerful and disciplined. It didn’t require any practice; I just realized that I had the mental and physical capability to do all that, so I just went for it. Now I can’t do it anymore; I mostly rely on emotions to act and do something. How can I come back to how I was?

Is there a book , a film , a content creator in social media or something that could help me develop discipline? I lack discipline entirely, and I don't know how to start

I want to start a business one day,but I'm scared that it will fail and because of that I'm very skeptical about starting one.

So, to summarize, the reason I haven't accomplished much in my life is due to my struggles with anxiety and depression. I know I shouldn’t use that as an excuse, but I also battle a lack of motivation and procrastinate a lot.

I’m turning 26 on December 31, and I’ll be losing my mom’s insurance on my birthday. It’s time for me to move forward, but it’s tough. I currently don’t have a job, a driver’s license, or any money, which are my biggest worries. I don’t have a degree, so college isn’t an option for me, despite repeated advice from others to enroll.

I could have gotten a job, but my parents only had access to one car, making transportation a challenge. Additionally, I don’t trust taxi or Uber drivers. Some people have suggested looking for remote jobs, but most call center positions would monitor me closely, and the loud noises from my relatives at home would likely lead to me being fired.

There have been times when my mom wanted me to work in her field, which is social services, conducting interviews. However, I’ve told her that I can’t handle situations where people yell at me or threaten me. I see how stressed she often gets, to the point where she’s yelling at her friends on the phone about her experiences.

It would be nice to work at night or find a job where I could have some peace. Being at home 24/7 usually leads me to feel overwhelmed, and I often end up crying. I realize I’ve brought some of this on myself due to my fear of failure. My parents had high expectations for me, but I never felt that pressure myself, even when I was in school. I just wanted to be alone and escape it all.

I apologise for the wall of text If it's too long the title pretty much says it all

Hi I have described this as a 99% syndrome in my life.

I start projects. Hundreds. Great ones. little ones. Life changing ones. Projects of all shapes and sizes.

And I get in to a flow state. Getting always so close to finishing them. Really within the last few metres of the race.

For example I have some great coding stuff, video editing stuff, stuff that would transform my work life, transform my home life whatever it may be all at the brink of execution.

But for whatever reason... Self doubt, needing perfection, or even no reason at all sometimes.. I go from full throttle to nothing right at the end. It's like hit an invisible wall.

So motivated. I can feel the end within a fingers breadth away and then WHAM I fall to the ground with nothing.

What could be causing this within me?

It's not like I'm burnt out. But my mind , my body will just never let me return to it. Like I'm a character in a game and I haven't unlocked that level yet so I just can't open the final door.

And what could be a potential fix for this? I was thinking a business partner or an accountability partner type of thing I also watched a great video where the philosophy lecturer discussed something he did with a group of his peers- they'd start an online chat session and announce what they were working on recently and something planned for the next hour. Then all work in silence with the camera watching them. And at the end of the hour they'd have to each say how far they got. Essentially publicly shaming themselves if they didn't achieve any of their work ...resulting in everyone achieving something at least small to avoid embarrassment. And basically each session they'd be announcing the progress of the thing over the week so there was some obligation to achieve your own goals big or small. Sounds amazing to me I even tried starting this with my friends I created a program to automate the whole thing via email but nobody really wants to achieve anything weirdly... Happy just waking up, working and going to sleep again.. I can't seem to find my crowd for it

Do people over time start feeling happy by doing the right but hard things (I dont feel happy while doing these things)? Is it the delayed gratification? Is it because we are constantly advertised for the junk things in life that we feel the effort for doing touhher things?

• Start by waking up at desired time instead of sleeping at desired time.
• Get sunlight for 15 minutes or more as quickly upon wake up, the best tool for adjusting circadian rhythm.
• Exercise leads to faster sleep time and mire REM sleep, so long as it's not 2-3 hours before bed. Preferably done in the morning to help adjust circadian rhythm.
• Avoid caffeine past 12pm.
• Memorise something, I can't explain the science like a neuroscientist would, but basically sleep is the time memory consolidation happens, memorising signals to the brain that sleep is needed.
• chamomile tea for relaxation.
• Bed should be strictly for sleep, don't feel like I have to restrict y'all about sex.
• No pets in bed while you sleep.
• Dawn light helps adjust circadian rhythm too, so go for a walk.
• No devices/blue light before bed but preferably not lights at all.
• No heavy meals 2-3 hours before bed but if you do eat, eat complex carbohydrates.
• Cool quiet dark room.
• Wear socks and gloves, so as to dilate blood vessels there.
• For racing minds, journal you day from beginning to end to offload, you want to have processed all your emotions, I personally let my mind wander for however it wants before it gets tired and I get sleepy.
• Get off bed ~15 minutes if you didn't fall asleep, I'm not sure about this advice, I have sleep anxiety and I know I'll be counting the minutes, but hopefully you'd have already fallen asleep.

Give it 3 days of sleep restriction while enforcing circadian rhythm.

Hope you have a good night's sleep.

Alright, I've been procrastinating assignments, really badly, to such a point where my perfect A's are dipping to C's, and the problem is whenever I try to open my computer, do an assignment, I just immediately get distracted and start scrolling on you tube, to counter this I've tried using apps that reward yourself habitica, QuestDo, but they haven't worked I just forget or click the done button even though I haven't done it yet. I've been putting Important essays due on the day of deadline. Even my teachers are disappointed, since they know i'm a great student. Is there any way to fix this, I've only been seeing bull on google.

I am trying to come up with daily, quantifiable goals that I can hit. here are some of my general goals that I have been trying to keep up with, but I am unsure of how exactly to keep:

1. Get a job in NYC that makes 100k.

2. Create more income streams independent of work (real estate, starting my own company, etc)

3. Be the most likable person possible. I already have a strong group of friends and from my understanding I do come across well from other people I've asked, but also at the same time I've never sustained a LTR. So my milage may vary. But I think I can do better.

4. More positive outlook on life.

Any suggestions?

Becoming a disciplined person is my goal for 2025 and I'm on an obsessive kick rn.

What does a disciplined person do when their "have to dos" are finished? I'm getting way ahead of myself with this question but it seems like a plausible problem if my plans pan out, especially because I have no dependents and few outside responsibilities.

I'm a college student and I have a pretty decent discipline,like I sit down to study,get my things done etc, when I'm at my dorm. BUT I have noticed that I'm pretty lazy when I'm at my home, I barely study even if I'm having exams the next day. Why is that? I really wanna maintain the habits i have when I'm in dorm in home too but I just can't. Am I being too comfortable at my house?

I get distracted from social media but I feel like deleting it would limit my ability to be informed of niche information such as tips for getting better grades or tip on an subject in learning I ponder with myself daily if I could naturally come up with these good ideas and same thinking without making me feel trapped for example I’ve recently been heavily on psychology tiktok and it’s made me realize why I’m avoidant when I get presented with a new task which is due to the way I handle anxiety which sounds simple but why can’t I see this by myself so I feel like deleting social media will make me very un aware of things that I do or learning new information

As we come into the final week of 2024 I wanted to share the one thing that I’ve done this year that has changed me for the better. And that is simply walking for fun. It’s something that started as an experiment with help from my family pushing me to do something physically active after brain surgery done in 2023. Now, I can hardly go a day without it. Pop my AirPods in and off I go. It helps my mental health so much. That on top of working out 2-3x a week I’m very happy with where I am physically and mentally right now. Room for improvement in 2025. Can’t wait!

Humans are really great at forgetting things.

We get comfortable.

Entropy – the slow decline into chaos that everything in the universe experiences – slowly takes over.

Our intentions fall to the back of our mind instead of the front.

But this is one of the worst things you can let happen when you’re attempting something that takes a long-term commitment, like quitting for good.

It’s deceptively easy to simply lose sight of why you’re doing it.

So part of your job is to regularly remind yourself of what you’re doing and why.

Keep your Future Vision top of mind, and let it pull you forward and give you the strength to make the right decisions.

Have a great day.

I just feel so bothered when I tell myself I'll do something but I end up not doing it and it just like the mind gives so much mixed feelings as if you just feel irritated with yourself. Like if you said you was gonna do something then do it, why are you ignoring and procrastinating.

Once Simon Senek asked "how do you guys go about recruiting people to Navy Seals Team 6".

And the Navy Seals, they drew a graph on Performance vs Trust.

Performance on the battlefield.

And Performance off the battlefield (like what sort of a person you are in real life).

And the thing is:

nobody wants

LP (low Performance) LT (low Trust) person

And nobody wants HP (high performance) LT (low Trust) person.

And they would rather recruit: MP (medium Performance ) HT (high trust) person

OR

LP (low performance) HT (high Trust) person..

So what is it that you get to understand from this is:

Performance can always be improved, slowly and gradually. BUT Trust, Ethics, Integrity, are something that should be their in your heart. It's something that cannot be taught as well. And it's very rare in people.

And Navy Seal Team6 they go for people who are trustworthy.

For me, it would be Penguin's Little Black classics box set.

(A set of 80 works by authors like Sophocles, Jane Austen, Edgar Allan Poe, H.G. Wells)

It has been on my radar for 3 years now, but the guilt of buying it and not reading it kept me form actually ordering it. But this year, come Jan 31st, I would like to imagine I'll complete the first milestone of my resolution, and gift myself this.

I feel weird saying this but I’m a full time employed 30yr old who works out 5x/week looking for someone who likes the idea of mentoring and helping someone become successful. I read, work, lift, and network but coming up short in certain areas. Most of the people I’ve came across all charge crazy amounts and they don’t care about you as a person. I’m willing to meet in person depending on how far you are from Toronto. Or we could do calls if you’re far away. I’m wondering if these type of people still exist. You can send me a direct message if you’re interested. Hope to hear from you.

I find it hard to see the end result of my bad actions, ex: wasting time on my phone,not doing homework, not working out etc. When I don't do these actions my mind doesnt see the consequences until they happen.

basically I use youtube a LOT for uni because there is lots of great videos for reviewing or for learnings concepts that I didn’t quite understand in class

the problem is i somehow end up on shorts a lot and then time passes so quick and suddenly i spend an hour+ watching videos that dont matter

i tried using screen time limits but the problem is when i am studying i ignore the limits and then sometimes end up on shorts cause its the same app

tips?

....But those kind of people aren't scrolling their phones until their thumbs hurt and eyes burn 🤡

Please make an effort find out if your late night sleep pattern is due to genetics or it's just fucked due to excessive screen time?

One way to do it is by banning screens after 9/10 pm for a week and see if it changes your sleep pattern.

Solid sleep is the foundation to all discipline and self improvement. Every other aspect of life is impacted by it.

While preparing for a competitive job exam, which is in mid-February next year, I procrastinated and wasted many months. I have all the material with me, and knowing my potential, if I start from now also, I can get a good score. I am unemployed, so I have lots of time, but the issue is I am afraid of failure. What if cramming stuff won't help now? People who are preparing from months ago will obviously be better than me. I procrastinated, get depressed over, and didn't do anything all this time, what can I do now? From today, I got myself a good room, all materials, leaving all distractions, and studying nicely, but all of a sudden this fear came onto my mind, and I am thinking, What's the use to do this now, which is giving me the urge to procrastinate once again.

Edit:Thank you all for your kind words. I will give my best and not worry.