My boy was unwell recently and had antibiotics. He's had tummy issues before which recurred with the meds. He was doing OK, not eating me out of house and home like normal but taking food. Then on Monday, he went off his food completely.
Appetite stimulants didn't work like usual so I've been syringe feeding him since Tuesday night. But today he really started kicking off about it and I didn't want to force him if he didn't want it.
On one hand I wanted him to rally; on the other he could come good only for this to recur again, except then I wouldn't be off work like I am now and able to care for/be with him.
My sister came over just now and said he seems checked out mentally. Even since yesterday he's lost a bit of his sass and spark.
I just got off the phone with the mobile vet; he's coming in the morning. I know logically it's the right thing to do but I'm trying to not fixate and just cry all night so I don't stress him out.
I wish I didn't know the exact time the vet was coming, but I also don't want to drag it out.
I don't know if I'm asking for advice or just venting, I just hope he can go peacefully and I'm not doing it too soon. He's over 18, a rescue, and he almost died two years ago (suspected a cancer) but he pulled through so yes we got bonus time. But it still hurts
His name is Roger 💗 and he is the bestest old boi 😭
Our fur babies definitely know. All the run-ups, the eye squints, and chirps weren’t for the trees and bees; they were for you. They love you and you love them ad infinitum… we will see them again sooner than later. ❤️
I don't see how he could not know. He was obviously blessed with the best human he could have ever hoped for. Today is an infinitely sad day for you, of course, but remember that between that first hello and this damned last goodbye, there has been so much love. So much love.
It will remain. Love does not disappear. Even death cannot do that.
I wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you and Roger, big time! I’m not here to tell you that you’re doing the right thing/wrong thing, because you know what’s best for your sweet boy. I know it’s tough, but you have to think of the LONG(!) life you gave this sweet fur boy. No way he would’ve had the life he did if it wasn’t for you!!! I’ll be thinking of the two of you!
I'm bascially in the same boat. My old guy, almost 16 has fluid in his lungs and nothing seems to work. He's only witching from lying around having trouble breething, going on the toilet, or going to eat/drink. Nothing more.
Tomorrow I'll try another x-ray to see if there is something we can try. But if not .... I don't dare thinking about it ...
I'm sorry. I've been through it once before; if you cam, it is marginally better for it to happen in a controlled way than a frantic dash to the vet. They can crash so fast 🥲
I’m so sorry 😢. You are doing the right thing. You don’t want him to suffer any longer. He knows how much you love him and I guarantee he is grateful for every second you gave him. It’s the hardest thing to do, but you are doing the right thing. 🌈🐾♥️
Not knowing if it’s really the right time to say goodbye is a tough uncertainty. You don’t want to make them suffer but you don’t want to give up on them. The vet should be able to check him out and see, they’re better at knowing these things.
The at-home vet said when he saw him that it was definitely the right time. Not too soon, and not too late, but today was right. Which helps a little bit
I am truly sorry. Roger is a beautiful cat.
In 2016 I had to have my cat Eddie put to sleep. It was the longest 10 minute drive to the vet but was a kindness before he got worse.
It really will hurt but if you do it now he will be at peace sooner. Letting it go on for another few days would be worse for you both.
In time it won’t be as bad but you had each other after he was rescued.
He chose you. They say cats choose their owners. Eddie did that to me and knew before I did that we were going to be friends.
Letting go is not easy but if he is at peace it may help you feel a little bit better the next few days.
Bless Roger and you!! I know it’s incredibly hard and difficult to have to do this because our babies are everything. Just give him all the love and time. Talk to him, hold him and give him all the snuggles and cuddles. I’m so sorry you’re going through this and I’m sending you so much love ❤️
It's such a heartbreaking decision to make and I'm proud of you for doing right by your beautiful boy.
I am so sorry for your loss and hope your last bit of time together is full of love.
The feeling of doing it too soon always felt like it was there when I had to deal with my cat and her issues. But she was very old as well and things just tend to happen and it’s better to not let them suffer when their issues grow to be burdensome. Besides, 18 is ancient for most cats so he lived more than a full life and then some, and I’m sure you made it great
Oh, Roger is such a distinguished gentleman! I love the crinkly coat that older cats get.
I think he appreciates that you’re listening to him. His nonverbal cues are all he really has to communicate with you about this - meows can only get so much across. He’s saying “it’s time to go, it’s time for me to rest,” and I think he is able to rest knowing that you’re going to honor those needs. If he has a favorite blanket or spot in front of a fireplace, maybe you can give him some extra snuggles there if he wants them.
I’m so sorry. He’ll be waiting at the rainbow bridge with his snazzy bandanas.
I don’t know you or your cat but from what I read in your post you both seem very lucky to have had each other. This stranger will be thinking about you and roger today. ❤️
Thank you very much. I was lucky to have him, definitely. He made my life better in so many ways and helped me through a lot. More loyal than most people. I don't really have a lot of in-person friends, so he was my best friend 🥲
I’m so sorry 😢. You are doing the right thing. You don’t want him to suffer any longer. He knows how much you love him and I guarantee he is grateful for every second you gave him. It’s the hardest thing to do, but you are doing the right thing. 🌈🐾♥️
I’m so sorry 😢. You are doing the right thing. You don’t want him to suffer any longer. He knows how much you love him and I guarantee he is grateful for every second you gave him. It’s the hardest thing to do, but you are doing the right thing. 🌈🐾♥️
Thank you 😭 I wish I was any good at painting so I could have him on my wall forever. Photos are nice but he deserves a big grand portrait in a fancy frame
They are in our lives for so very briefly, but it is our responsibility to care for them and that means making hard choices. You made the right choice.
Roger knows you loved him up to the very end and he'll stay in your heart. I hope that you can still have a Happy Holiday season now and in the future.
Also, some places online will do a mock painting style of a photo with wrapped canvas. Then you can get a fancy looking frame.
I’m sorry for your loss, he looks like such a sweet boy. There are companies that do the whole picture to painting on canvas thing. I did it for my wife and me, and my parents one year for Christmas. If you google “picture to canvas”, a whole bunch of them show up. Just pick a reputable one and they can do it. You just send them a photo of your boy and pick out the size of your canvas and they do it.
Sending you so much love ♥️ you loved him through life & now you will hold his little paw as he crosses the rainbow bridge 🐾 it’s the most heart breaking honor, know he loves you very much! Hang in there ♥️♥️
Roger is in my heart and prayers now. I know that doesnt mean much for your pain and grief. I can see the love you have for him very clearly. Im so so so sorry
I’m sorry you have to make that decision, it’s the toughest one we’ll make as pet people. From the outside it sounds to me like he’s telling you it’s time but I know how hard it is to accept when you’re the one making the decision. May he pass peacefully.
If it should be that I grow frail and weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then will you do what must be done,
For this — the last battle — can’t be won.
You will be sad I understand,
But don’t let grief then stay your hand,
For on this day, more than the rest,
Your love and friendship must stand the test.
We have had so many happy years,
You wouldn’t want me to suffer so.
When the time comes, please, let me go.
Take me to where to my needs they’ll tend.
Only, stay with me till the end
And hold me firm and speak to me
Until my eyes no longer see.
I know in time you will agree
It is a kindness you do to me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I have been saved.
Don’t grieve that it must be you
Who has to decide this thing to do;
We’ve been so close — we two — these years,
Don’t let your heart hold any tears.
Thinking of you and Roger. It is never easy but know his life was literally saved by your love for him and Roger obviously gave much love to you. There will be a large welcoming committee waiting for him OTRB.
You can’t stop the biology of the situation. He sounds like he’s nearing his time. Being there with him and holding him while he goes is, IMO, the greatest gift you can give him. He won’t be scared and alone. He’ll be with his beloved family. So painful but so important. I’m so sorry and am with you guys in spirit.
He's a handsome kitty. You're doing what's best for him. It's always a difficult decision to make and you're going to always 2nd guess it. You're doing what is best for him.
Just remember that you've given him a life filled with love.
If you can see the need, it is NEVER too soon. Cats hide their discomfort and pain very well. I had a very good vet tell me that by the time we realize/decide it’s usually time or past time - holding on longer becomes for us, not them.
It hurts because you love him so much. It will always hurt but eventually you will smile when you remember all the silly things that made him so special.
I’m so sorry 😢. You are doing the right thing. You don’t want him to suffer any longer. He knows how much you love him and I guarantee he is grateful for every second you gave him. It’s the hardest thing to do, but you are doing the right thing. 🌈🐾♥️
I feel for you. I just had to put my 14 year old kitty down a little over 2 weeks ago. She was battling Chronic Pancreatitis among other health issues. After 6 months of health struggles and thousands of dollars in vet bills without improvement, it was time. I’m here to say that you just know when it’s time for them to pass peacefully. You see their personality change and you see them struggle. It’s not the life they want, and you don’t wish low quality of life for them either.
Please know you’re doing the right thing. Roger knows he was loved. The kindest thing you can do for him is just let him go without pain.
Saying goodbye, if only temporarily, is the absolute worst part about owning a pet. But, it’s worth it when you factor in all the love they’ve given over the years! Hugs. ❤️
Her name was Cocoa, but we always called her Cocoa Bean or Miss Bean. She was a calico. My husband and I brought her home as an 8 week old kitten after my aunt discovered a litter of kittens had been born in her horse barn. She was part of our family her entire life before saying goodbye!
Many, many years ago, I read a quote from a vet who said (paraphrasing here) "putting an animal to sleep when it's their time is the last best thing you can do for them." I try to keep that in mind when I have to put a cat down.
It's still such a hard decision, and I'm so sorry this is happening in your life. This internet stranger is teary for you. 💔
Awww sending you love, Roger boy. So handsome, you did good, son. He will see you again someday Mama. Ask him to visit you in your dreams like my Julius did. It happened only once, but I could feel his fur again and he told me he was doing well and painfree. I’m so sorry. ❤️😪 It’s never easy, but try to feel thankful for all the years you did have together and how much he filled your heart with love and joy.
i bet he does know how much u love him but i also think he knows the the rainbow bridge is calling him, im sorry this has to happen i know whaat losing a pet is like, i had a pitbull and her name was luna whitch means moon in spanish cuz my brother and gran r from colombia and my mom and i arnt but she knows mostly spanish but anyways she passed away a few monthes ago and she was 16 and the sweetest gurl ever but now we have a puppy for my other dog rex bc he was so lonely and sad without her so we named her sparkee and she looks like m cat oreo
We just had to got through this with 2 of our cats, one was 21 and the other had cancer that was getting worse.
My advice is this: the vet will give 2 shots: one to make them high as hell and fall asleep, the other two stop their heart. They will want the cat to be comfortable for the first shot as they can feel the needle. I would recommend lots of love and goodbyes and holding your baby for the first shot, preferably petting them and showing them lots of love.
Our Potato was just sitting on the couch when she got the first shot and was scared, then hopped down. I shipped her and held her as she fell asleep, but I regret not holding her from the start.
Thank you. Yes, I'd seen the process with my previous kitty. We cuddled for the first one, then I laid him on the bed on his side like we do for naps and held his paw while he looked at me for the second
I’m sorry you are going through this pain and grief. It’s always the hardest part but you are showing him the ultimate love in this difficult situation. May Roger rest in peace and I wish you peace and acceptance after a while…I’m so sorry for your loss 🙏🏻
So sorry, this is heartbreaking , but you’re doing the right thing. Enjoy your last bit of time together and give him all the cuddles. I recently lost my girl who was 18 and on borrowed time, they are the best best creatures 😭❤️
I am so sorry. We had to put down my 18 year old girl in September (my son and I adopted her when she was a kitten) and my wife and I lost our 14 year old girl in October.
Remember the good times and you are doing the right thing as our goal should be to give them a long and healthy life and help them pass peacefully when that it longer possible.
We are so sorry, and share your pain. As we are currently at a very similar point with our 13 y.o. "bestest old boi" ("Ghostie"). We are broken hearted, and presently fighting and advocating for him with our vet hospital, but today he is still, calm, and after a second day of not eating or drinking, seems to have his eyes on a quieter place. We wish for peace for yourself, and Roger
Beautiful Dovah. Feel free to share a picture of her if you feel able. There's just something about grey kitties. I imagine at some point the kitties over rainbow Bridge do have club meetups by shade 😅
Has your boy been tested for thyroid issues…. My boy exhibited similar symptoms as yours at that age. After being prescribed methimazole he went on to live another four years….
Yea, he's been on thyroid meds for about a year or so. But he had other issues that may or may not have been cancer, so it could have been that too. I didn't put him through invasive tests at his age, so we'll never know.
Thanks everyone for all your comments and support. It really does help.
We didn't sleep a lot last night, more dozed in between Roger's trips to take a lap of the house. He definitely was starting to decline; he kept going to his water bowl but forgetting why. Then back onto the bed. So I put on our usual re-run TV shows and we cuddled and snoozed.
At one point he came back on the bed (he has kitty steps to get up) and walked right up to me and smashed his face against mine, rubbing his nose all over me and purring for about five minutes. I got all the kitty snot 😅
This morning I got up and offered him some of his favourite foods in case he felt like eating, but he didn't, so we cuddled some more. Then we went outside so he could walk on the grass. He used to go for walks in his harness and lead, but because of his paw issue we haven't been able to do that for a few months. He enjoyed the sun and smelling all the smells and seeing the birds.
A nice man stopped to say hello and he asked about Roger's age etc, he must have seen my face then he came over and said he'd had to let his kitty go a few weeks back and that Roger was loved and would know I'd do my best.
I was crying then and the man said he doesn't normally take his walk this way but for some reason he did today and now he knows it was to pat Roger and tell him he was a good boy 🥲
Then we went inside for more cuddles and the vet came.
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u/Grouchy_Value7852 15h ago
Roger knows you gave him all the belly rubs and toonas!!! Such a handsome gentleman.
He will not forget your love. You will honor his memory all the time.