Yeah, whatâs important is matching the energy of the person coming out. If they say it as a casual thing, then treat it casually. If they seem a little nervous, then give them a smile and a few nice words. If they seem really worried about your reaction, then do whatever you need to assure them that youâre not bothered.
give them the 'ol "I appreciate you feeling comfortable enough to tell me" speech because that's how i would be to any of my friends if they came out to me.
Don't build up this huge story in your head that your partner is going to reject and hate you for coming out and then while thinking it's basically over because of that, catch the feels for that hot coworker, who gets off on going after married people. That's gonna be a much more difficult conversation.
So why would you even come out? If it matters that little, why even talk about it? I donât mean this question from a place of mean intentions. It just doesnât make sense to me. If the reaction youâre wanting is that muted, why discuss it? To me, youâre treating it like the equivalent of telling a partner you found a dollar bill on the sidewalk today.
Because I want to share everything about myself with my partner. Random thoughts, deep thoughts, stupid thoughtsâŚI want to both hear and tell these to someone Iâm close with. Why hide something that is a part of me? I donât want a huge parade, I just want it to be a fact about me that they know, like my favorite pizza or preferred temperature setting.
Jokes on me though, after I told him he slowly started pulling away and then told me âwell at least you can date girls nowâ at the START of his conversation asking for a divorce.
I mean, why would a partner want to hear about you suddenly discovering a form of sexuality that cannot possibly include him. How is that good news? Lol.
I think you probably should have kept that pizza flavor to yourself. Think about others feelings.
Exactly this. Imagine your partner actively reading articles and posts about how to support bi partners rather than just saying âneatâ and pretending it doesnât exist.
Alright, I still don't get it, but maybe only because my bisexuality isn't a big part of my identify but... what would I need support with? What ARTICLES would they read? Hell, I'm mostly on this sub because hot guys and girls are often posted but I don't even know what I have to do due to my bisexuality... what should I expect from my partner?!
I canât tell you what to expect, but partners can at least be educated about what itâs like navigating this world as a bisexual person. For men specifically, this includes ideas about masculinity, closeted queerness, and gender roles.
The social stigma is that bi men are just gay men in denial using women as âbeards.â Just the idea of a heterosexual partner attempting to put themselves in the shoes of someone who has viewed the world through a queer lens their whole life is important to me, because theyâre trying to understand, accept, and know me better.
Yeah I mean itâs a meme so itâs not exactly a fully fleshed out idea, but I think you nailed it - itâs about trying to understand what itâs like to be viewed in society as a bisexual person and just trying to empathize - and identify - the hardships they might face due to that. Itâs not like, watching Magic Mike together.
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u/mixermassive 10d ago
Is there a difference between 1 and 2?