r/JewsOfConscience • u/AutoModerator • Jul 31 '24

AAJ "Ask A Jew" Wednesday

It's everyone's favorite day of the week, "Ask A (Anti-Zionist) Jew" Wednesday! Ask whatever you want to know, within the sub rules, notably that this is not a debate sub and do not import drama from other subreddits. That aside, have fun! We love to dialogue with our non-Jewish siblings.

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u/itsyourbirthdayz Non-Jewish Ally Jul 31 '24

What is a good way to deal with Jewish Zionists in your personal life or at work?
In recent months I have only had two real conversations with my Jewish acquaintances about Israel. After both of these conversations I felt resentful. To me it seemed like they wanted to establish the parameters of the conversation before I had a chance to say anything or make any criticism of Israel or the current war. These people know me well, so it hurts to think that they might be wary of what I might say or what I might be thinking. It hurts to think that I have views that are going to upset my friends. I hate censoring myself because I spend a lot of time thinking about my ideas in general, and my Jewish friends have been some of my most reliable and compassionate sounding boards—especially when it comes to political or identity issues. But now those relationships have become more superficial and I hate that. Isn’t it tacit approval of Zionism to stay silent? Isn’t it just completely fake to let people believe that I don’t have anti Zionist views?

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u/Pitiful_Meringue_57 Jewish Aug 02 '24

While i understand u being disappointed with their wariness, you need to understand where they r coming from. Jews are very paranoid abt antisemitism especially now, and they r very aware and hyper vigilant of it. Being lectured by non jews abt anti semitism or judaism is not fun, for anyone. I think u should listen to their parameters. See if they r reasonable and if so continue the conversation. If not explain why u don’t want one of the parameters. I also wouldn’t necessarily start the conversation with them, but engage if they bring it up. Make it very clear ur intentions and respect and care for them as people.

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u/itsyourbirthdayz Non-Jewish Ally Aug 02 '24

Thanks, this is all good advice. But after thinking about it I have somewhat of a different issue in mind now. I’m a Latino and I keep thinking about my two Jewish friends who have talked with me extensively about race, identity, politics, oppression, prejudice, history, activism, etc.

I think my mind has been blown because they have both responded to this war in a way that I didn’t expect at all. I find it inconsistent with some of the other things we have talked about at length over the years. Plus, it’s really confusing because that we didn’t really have a conversation, from my end it felt very defensive and awkward, which is unusual for these relationships.

There are probably a lot of people who are progressive or leftist on most issues but not on this one. Maybe that’s something that can happen when you feel threatened and unsafe? I have certainly been through that with my own stuff.

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u/Pitiful_Meringue_57 Jewish Aug 03 '24

Reading all of that rly doesn’t surprise me at all. Israel and zionism is very personal and deeply entrenched in a lot of jews, including socially progressive and even economically progressive ones. Most US jews are socially progressive and atleast moderately economically progressive, yet israel is still broadly popular. This subreddit and JVP and INN exist for a reason and show a very real phenomenon of anti and non zionist jews, but just bcz we get a lot of media coverage and attention in activist and protest spaces doesn’t mean we represent a large portion of diaspora jews.

It’s also definitely abt feeling threatened and unsafe and generational and taught trauma.

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u/itsyourbirthdayz Non-Jewish Ally Aug 03 '24

Thanks! This makes so much sense. I think my friends have basically said what you are saying, but the communication was somewhat indirect and I’ve had a hard time interpreting it.
I need to remember that I have the exact same inconsistencies when it comes to what has been traumatic and threatening to me. In fact, one of my friends I am talking about has pointed this out to me just a few months ago.