I am so sad

[u/DrFredz]

I am just so sad. In short, I saved up all my life and sacrificed everything I could until the age of 38 and opened a restaurant right before COVID hit. Long story short, restaurant is sold at a major loss, life savings gone and I just put up my family home for sale to pay off my debts, will be renting because my credit is shot. Will have to take my autistic son out of his private school and put him in a crappy public school. Marriage took a major hit and I’m not sure if we’ll come out of it ok. I’m out of a job and feel like I can’t work anymore, yet I cannot afford even a week without any income.

I’ve been crying all day and I can’t stop. I’m so sad my heart physically aches. I can’t sleep and cannot hold back my tears and sadness. I know everyone will say stuff like “stay strong” and “it’ll get better” or “there are others that have it worse”, but for me, since the age of 16, I have dedicated every second of every day, made so many sacrifices and suffered so much to get somewhere where I could lead a good life and leave something good for my kids when I’m gone, only to end up with such an outcome. I am destroyed and hurting so much.

I lost hope. I was always positive even when times were hard. I always believed hard work and sacrifices will eventually pay off. I always believed that if I do good I will eventually reap the benefits. I have always tried to be kind, generous, helpful and compassionate with everyone I encountered, no matter who they were. I was religious and believed I will be rewarded for my efforts. I was wrong all along and it really really really hurts to hit the wall and find out all of it was in vain.

I’m not sure what I’m looking for by posting this but I hope to feel even a little better after putting it out there. Thanks for reading me and good luck to everyone out there, life is unfair and cruel.

[u/[deleted]]

My heart aches. I can say things will get better. Don't give up hope. I will ask you this though What are you doing right now? Are you working in a restaurant? Can you do side work? Example can you do a food cart or cook in someone's home? I do not know where you live and I do not know the laws. I am just trying to feel out ways that you might be able to bounce back.

[u/DrFredz → u/[deleted]]

Right now I’m still operating the restaurant but it will be closing in about 1.5 months. After that, I have no idea what I will be doing. At this moment I feel completely paralyzed and just going through the motions. I am so sad and so out of strength I can barely think.

[u/MountainHighOnLife → u/DrFredz]

Covid really screwed a lot of restaurants. It's such a high risk business as is with very thin profit margins even under the best of circumstances. I am sorry that happened to you.

I'd suggest (if you haven't yet) considering what a pivot would look like for you. Could you rent commercial kitchen space and sell weekly meal prepping? Is a food truck an option? How about catering or private chef work?

My sister is a chef and lost her job during covid. She has built a really successful business doing "on demand" type cooking. Basically she puts out a weekly menu and people place their order. Some people will buy a week's worth of meals and others will buy 1-2 meals but she stays very busy. She rents a commercial kitchen space for something like $20 or $30 /hr and cooks once during the weekend and once mid-week Then has a pick up spot where people can grab their orders. It works really well for her with very little overhead.

[u/DrFredz → u/MountainHighOnLife]

Thank you so very much for your input and suggestion. I will definitely be looking into something like this, just need to get out of my ‘’shock’’ phase right now but that’s definitely a great possibility. Thanks again so much

[u/MountainHighOnLife → u/DrFredz]

You are absolutely entitled (and should!) grieve your dream and the resources lost. It sucks. It really, really sucks! I'm sorry it happened. Take your time to mourn and when you're ready, know that you might have some options to keep your dream in action. It just might look differently than you anticipated.

[u/LittleBirdBun → u/MountainHighOnLife]

I was coming to say something similar! You could market meals for brand new parents so friends and family can buy a freezer meal from you for them. Holiday meals?

I'm so sorry this happened to you and I truly hope you're able to find something that works. Have you tried doing a TikTok video maybe and ask what people would be interested in? Might help to get extra ideas.

All the best!!

[u/MountainHighOnLife → u/LittleBirdBun]

Ohhh! That is a fantastic idea! I love the idea of "meal gifts".

[u/[deleted] → u/DrFredz]

Can you do banquets or cook in people's homes for special occasions? Something that will still generate income? I get it. I understand. I am just trying to give you ideas.

[u/DrFredz → u/[deleted]]

It actually is a possibility that I will eventually explore. Thank you so much for taking the time to write and help me, I appreciate it more than words can say.

[u/[deleted] → u/DrFredz]

I get it. Take care.