r/stopdrinking • u/Federal-Ask1617 1837 days • 1d ago

Got rejected tonight

Hey folks, I’ll keep it brief here. Hoping someone can relate to it maybe. Before I got sober I struggled with being able to confront people or topics that are a bit touchy, unless under the influence. Be that with women, or be that with my parents or whatnot. That went for everything besides work. My business revolves around rejection ironically enough. But, being rejected in my business never made me subconsciously question my self worth I guess. Anyways, point is - emotions, communication… all of it was a struggle unless intoxicated. Of course the intoxication lead to the numbing of “feelings” and would allow me to be “brave” enough to say whatever I “wanted” to say. Granted, it lead to mostly bad things.

So, after five years, I’ve been slowly building myself up to doing things sober and boy has it been tough but worth it. Be that dancing in a club all the way to asking a women out. Today, I asked someone out that I liked but was unsure if she liked me back.

She rejected me …. It sucked, and it stung a bit, but I did it. Sober. Didn’t need a drink to ask her out. Didn’t need a drink to numb the emotions of being rejected. And I didn’t lash out in drunken anger neither. Kept it polite and all…

I don’t know why, but it feels like a win…… but I should be sad? lol. Maybe I am a bit sad that I got rejected but I’m also kinda happy I was able to do that. I mean I’ve dated in the last five years so it’s not the first time I’ve asked someone out and got rejected sober. But it’s the first time I really stopped and realized that I did that… sober.

Alright hope that helps someone and if not… thanks for listening and allowing me to vent. And of course, thank you everyone for keeping me sober tonight.

Iwndwyt

242 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

47 comments sorted by

View all comments

35

u/NotTheMama73 196 days 1d ago

Sorry it did not work out for you but happy you are staying sober. You should be proud of yourself!

18

u/Federal-Ask1617 1837 days 1d ago

Thanks and it’s all good. It’s just another part of the journey. I think in the past I’d get so wrapped up on “how one should respond” or ask the question “why?” A lot.

I think now it’s just about accepting the things I cannot change or have no control over and just using my favorite motto “it is what it is”

Thanks for commenting on here and letting me take a few minutes of your day.