r/howtonotgiveafuck • u/Villikortti1 • 4d ago
Socializing with wrong people will slowly kill you.
So socializing is a core function for us to remain healthy. However these days I see a lot of forced socializing. What this tends to do is destroy your own well being while searching for a better well being. Socializing is very important but socializing with wrong people will literally slowly kill you.
We as humans when we face trials in life we either face those fears and deal with them or we internalize these shortcomings into insecurities that we will carry on our surface. What we tend to do then is anyone we meet we start to project that failure on to them. This causes stress on the person we are interacting with. He/she may even start to internalize some of this insecurity on from the other person. This is unhealthy.
We all have had atleast one point in our lifes when we were at that place. When we couldnt face our insecurities and deal with them. Go back in your mind to that time and think because there was 100% atleast one person who saw you were hurting and didnt let you poject your hurt on to them. You became furious to that person most likely. You thought that they didnt take your hurt seriously or you thought they were acting better than you. I know because I did this alot in the past. With this knowledge we know that person knew you just were hurting and you tried to ease your pain by trying to make him/her carry your hurt for you and they knew it wouldnt be healthy for them. Also saying anything to you about your hurt would just hurt more. So they just keep their distance because they know the only one who can help yourself is you.
These people have gone through all the pain you are going through and know how it feels so they pity you. They also know you are unhealthy for them to keep around so they seek healthy people to socialize with.
Become this person. Being this person is the core of health and happiness. You wont be the greatest or strongest or wealthiest. But the funny part is you understand that why you wanted these things was because of your unresolved shortcomings has made you hate yourself and your selfimage so you tried to overcompensate with admiration from others. Because you couldnt love yourself you wanted to outsource it from others.
Here is the good news. It easy. All you need to do is to start to be honest with yourself. Time will do the rest.
11
u/Electrical-Pickle927 4d ago
Thank you for this post. It’s time we’re all stop to reflect on ourselves. It is truly the greatest way not to give a fuck.
7
u/MrAgave 3d ago
Define forced socializing? Elaborate on putting our failures upon the other party? Etc etc,
I think I know where you’re coming from but your point is ill defined. Truly not giving a fuck would inherently be not doing what you’re apparent initial thesis (for want of a better term) is suggesting.
Just go out and socialize. Be you. Or don’t. It doesn’t matter at all, just don’t hurt anybody.
3
u/sneezingfeathers 1d ago
They also know you are unhealthy for them to keep around so they seek healthy people to socialize with
This is why I had to end a friendship recently. Their mental issues and life problems were taking a toll on me, and it raised alarm bells when I realized I was starting to think, sound and act like them. Misery loves company. When people are miserable themselves and on a sinking boat, they want you to sink with them. Be careful who you surround yourself with, even those who seem “nice at first”
8
2
1
u/PomeloSpecialist356 3d ago
Sometimes certain people come into our lives for a certain reason, at a certain time, and for a certain amount of time. Take the information, appreciate the good times, and move forward for yourself. It doesn’t mean they are gone from your life, paths may cross again and relationships may rekindle. Sometimes it takes people being apart from you, and you being apart from them, for you to see their importance, and for them to see yours.
1
1
u/Radodin73 1d ago
I won’t and can’t disagree with the sentiment and sense of your post, sounds marvelous. Alas,….it’s quite naive though. The ONLY thing that will do is turn you into a “yes man”, and cause vast amounts of undue stress.
Why put any effort whatsoever into someone you don’t know, and is near certainly going to betray you at the first opportunity?
In THIS world, it is the loudest that gets served first. The better you are at lying, the further you’ll make it, and the better off you will be.
🤷♂️Hey, it’s not my fault. I personally wish the women of earth were actually more like porn stars,…but wish in one hand and shit in the other, ya know?!🤣
When people quit creating a traffic jam because they stop to gawk at the misfortune of others on the OPPOSITE SIDE OF THE INTERSTATE that didn’t even wreck, just pulled over.,…. I may consider it!!
0
•
u/AutoModerator 4d ago
Thank you /u/Villikortti1 for posting!
For those reading this message, consider joining our discord server!
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.