r/facepalm 'MURICA Aug 28 '24

🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​ i'm speechless

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u/RofiBie Aug 28 '24

Us Europeans simply cannot understand how the US tipping culture has been allowed to exist. It is terrible for everyone except restaurant owners. Don't pay your staff properly and expect customers to deal with that separately? WTAF?

I own a pub and restaurant and help run a Yacht club that has a very good restaurant and bars. In both cases we pay our staff well above minimum wage and oddly enough we have staff who have been with us for 20-30 years and do a fantastic job and our customers are happy. In the Yacht Club, there is a specific ban on tipping of staff. It does occasionally happen, but we prefer to deal with it directly. For example, we have just had an amazing summer and have done really well, so I'm just sorting out the bonus payments for all staff this morning. All of them will get an additional £500-1500 in their pay packets at the end of next month.

I realise it is a weird concept, but well paid staff means a good service, happy customers and from my perspective a successful business. We never have any issue recruiting or retaining staff, whereas other businesses in the hospitality world around us are always crying for staff and complaining that "no-one wants to work in the sector any more." They do, they just need to get paid properly and treated with respect.

The US tipping culture fails on both fronts.

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u/[deleted] Aug 28 '24 edited Nov 18 '24

[deleted]

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u/fgzhtsp Aug 28 '24

I never calculated the tip in % in Germany. I only round up according to the total price/service quality/mood.

It's entirely a feelings thing for me.

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u/CamR111 Aug 28 '24

I'm the same. I recently went for a meal and it came out to £84.80 I thought the waitress had been lovely, talking us through the drinks and helping us pick a starter. I paid £90. £5.20 as a tip. It was very unusual for me. I can't remember the last time I tipped in the UK. The service generally doesn't warrant it and often the staff are earning the same or more than I do hourly.

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u/glytxh Aug 28 '24

I’m not tipping for expected service, but if I’m with an obnoxiously drunk group and we’ve been catered to all night, there’s gonna be a £20 tip when the bill comes.

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u/celoteck Aug 28 '24

True. I nearly always tip at least a bit, mostly to not have too much annoying coins in my pockets. Like when I order a beer for 3,70 I just make it 4. But depending on the situation I tip more. If It's a busy night and I have to wait on the bar to order something, I'm not blaming the bartenders or servers but tip them a bit more instead. If we order a whole lot of stuff and constantly want something new the tip is obviously higher and when we spent hours there and everyone gives five bucks extra it quickly adds up to 30-50€. If someone is unnecessarily rude or something I don't tip at all. Also I only tip cash. Here in Germany tipping a server with card is something I don't really trust. No idea if it gets split or just ends up with the owner.

I always see tips as a sign of appreciation (or an apology if I feel like I made their day harder then necessary like ordering and then remembering that I forgot something and making them walk a second time - it's something that is their job but I still caused unnecessary work) not something that should be required.

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u/glytxh Aug 28 '24

Your second paragraph absolutely nails it.

When I’m giving a tip, it’s either a Thank You, or somewhat of an apology.

Always cash. It just feels like an addition to a bill if done with a card, and like you say. I don’t trust card tips.

I’ve worked as a waiter. I never once saw extra money in my paycheque from those card tips.

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u/ninpendle64 Aug 28 '24

I'm in the UK too, will generally tip about 10% for good service in a restaurant.

However what I fail to understand is why their industry is often deemed worthy or tipsy, but my own isn't. I'm a Senior Paddlesport/watersports instructor at a watersports centre, when teaching people how to kayak/canoe/paddleboard I am often only focusing on very few people at one time (maximum of 6/8). Whilst on the water I am responsible for their enjoyment of the session, their learning, and most importantly their safety. I have undertaken many courses to qualify me to run these sessions at cost to myself and always at the end of the session get the "that was amazing, thankyou" etc but never a tip. And I will get paid about the same hourly rate as a waiter/waitress.

There is a complete disconnect between tipping and industries and where it should be done. I would argue that due to my training and mental load, and risk during a day that people in my industry are much more deserving of tips but we often leave the day with nothing extra

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u/Yatima21 Aug 28 '24

If you want tips in the water sports industry you need to be abroad. I don’t know the industry is like since brexit but I did 10 years of beach seasons and I was making bank on tips. The standard operators sun sail Nelson etc, wage was shit but if you are good with people you can easily make £500 extra a week. The hard part was not drinking it all away.

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u/raobienl Aug 28 '24

Same applies to me, but a little insight from working 6 years as a waiter in 2 different restaurants, the standard tipping ranged from 5-10%, 10% on good days, most of the days it was between 7% and 8% for me.

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u/United-Cow-563 Aug 28 '24

I can attest to previous delivery driver experience. There’s a delivery fee (that does not go to the drivers) and then the tips do go to the drivers. However, only cash tips go to the drivers, a certain amount of a credit card tip gets deducted before the driver sees any of it.

Furthermore, I worked at Domino’s for three years. At the time (2015-2018), drivers made minimum wage, which was $7.65/hour when not on a delivery. When on a delivery, Domino’s cut the minimum wage in half with the reasoning being that drivers make tips (not guaranteed) and they pay for our mileage. On deliveries, I’d be making $3.82/hour and I was out on deliveries more than I was in the store. I remember working a 99 hour work week (bi-weekly pay) and receiving a $500 paycheck and by the end of the month I had made only $1000 thanks to tips.

In addition, every time I wanted to get food my managers would tell me I couldn’t because I had pizzas to deliver. So, I worked there for 3 years, 5 days a week, 12+ hour shifts, and didn’t get a lunch break, or 10-15 minute break in those 3 years. I also had monthly oil changes, had a car get totaled (insurance determined it wasn’t my fault), had another car get into 3 accidents (insurance determined it wasn’t my fault), and I’d often get flats from nails somehow finding their way into my tires. Very stressful part of my life, living between $300 and $0 in my bank account after rent, gas, groceries, and utilities were taken out.

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u/Bored_dane Aug 28 '24

Hi neighbour! Same here in Denmark.

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u/infidel11990 Aug 28 '24

That's how it should be. You tip when the server goes beyond their usual responsibilities and you had great food/time at the place.

Tipping for simply doing the bare minimum is absurd.

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u/Squeezitgirdle Aug 28 '24

That's how it started in the us.

Now though...

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u/Scotsch Aug 28 '24

Many years ago, we were a group of high schoolers (european, not drinking and well behaving) visiting Germany, we had a sloppy and grumpy waitress for a dinner, after half had paid she goes "you realize there's no tip included right?".
Found that amusing.

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u/lunchpadmcfat Aug 28 '24

I was gonna say that I distinctly remember not tipping in Germany (as an American), and getting a rather cold look for it.

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u/MeinLieblingsplatz Aug 28 '24

German customer service is also complete garbage (as someone who has lived in 4 other counties and lives in Germany to make 5 countries on 3 different continents)

American tipping culture is fucking stupid. But you would expect Americans to abide by cultural customs when they visit Germany. These guys are assholes.

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u/cosmicdicer Aug 28 '24

In Greece is something for showing appreciation while also considered kind of mandatory. Its like showing at a birthday party without a gift, no one obligates you but you will look bad. But there's no % or anything in our minds, you free to leave as much money as you like/can/choose

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u/RopeDifficult9198 Aug 28 '24

thats how it started.

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u/CargillZ Aug 28 '24

Or if you go to oktoberfest.. everyone expected a tip even the ones sitting in front of the bathrooms.....

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u/EmDeelicious Aug 28 '24

I visited Berlin couple of weeks ago, and many of the restaurants and diner there are starting to request extremely high (15+%) tips. It was ridiculous, and I really hope that there will be some resistance to that in Berlin, otherwise it might spread to other regions…

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u/cortsense Aug 28 '24

I'd say there's kind of cultural pressure here in Germany as well. Sure, here and there, I've met one the type of guys who explain to me that it wouldn't be necessary to tip if they found some remark in the menu which says something like "prices incl. service", but the vast majority of people would consider it very impolite not to tip - as long as we're talking about restaurants or similar locations. If somebody didn't tip just because they don't have to, this would be a reason for me to question the relationship to that person, because it's arrogant and not a very social behavior. That's why I'd say there's some kind of cultural pressure. I figure there are situations when you'd not tip in Germany, but I can't give any example right now. It really depends on the situation. In contrast to the US, you'd not find jobs like guys who operate the lift or who carry your luggage, at least not until you're in some luxury hotel.
If you tip, it's certainly much less than in the US. It's also right that there's no "official" defintion of how much it should be.

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u/temporaryuser1000 Aug 29 '24

Have you noticed that here in Germany they have started shoving the machine in your face with tip options already on the buttons?

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u/Firefiststar Aug 28 '24

I would argue that this culture pressure has actually arrived here (Germany) too, especially with card readers now displaying suggested tips

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u/eVerYtHiNgIsTaKeN-_- Aug 28 '24

Oh fuck this! 10%ish or rounded up. If it's food I'm not sitting down for I pay asking price, nothing else.

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u/CouchAlchemist Aug 28 '24

In Germany that is absolutely correct but would you apply that rule to all countries across the world? If yes would you pay German food prices in other countries like pay 5 euros for a beer in Thailand?

There are very very few countries in the world where service staff get paid living wage. I live in UK and travel a lot in Europe and Asia. I dont apply a single rule for all countries and try to respect local rules.

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u/Syl4x Aug 28 '24

I was in Berlin once and asked 3 times for "just" tap water and he never brought it to me. Had to go to the bar and ask for a glass of tap water. And they made me pay for it! I don't know if it's common in Germany but we don't do that in France. And then, at the end the waiter asked me for tips. I said no and he was like "Really?" like if I was some kind of douchebag or something. I mean, bro, I'm glad to tip waiters in restaurants when they actually deserve it. This little whiney waiter did not. I feel like when it's forced it's kinda weird. Tips should only be given when you feel like it.

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u/[deleted] Aug 28 '24 edited Nov 18 '24

[deleted]

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u/Syl4x Aug 28 '24

I don't live in Paris but in Bordeaux. I have lived in several cities, and travelled a lot in France and I can tell that it's similar everywhere: tips are welcome if wanted but never forced. And also tap water is, almost everywhere, free. I heard some stories about restaurants that serve it hot to force you to buy mineral water but never saw it myself. My cousin has a restaurant in Bordeaux and people usually give tips because they are happy with their food.

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u/trip6s6i6x Aug 28 '24 edited Aug 28 '24

The issue is you don't really understand how restaurants work in the US. Bussers and cooks usually don't get tipped, no - but that's generally balanced out by them getting paid much better by their employer. With wait staff, it's expected that they don't even get minimum wage (more often getting half that or less) with the expectation that their wages will be made up for in tips. Not saying it's right, just saying that's simply how it is.

In the example in this thread, the wait staff effectively got stiffed around $55-60 of what should have been their wages by some shitters who didn't understand what's going on and instead tried to make some stupid, culturally superior point, ultimately at the servers' expense.

Here's a comparison. Go to Japan. Wear muddy boots when invited into someone's home, ground mud deep into their rugs, scratch their wooden floors, and then tell them "well in my country we don't take off our shoes inside". You made your point, sure, but you'd still be looked at like a jackass. That's effectively what these people did.

I get it - I do. And you don't have to like tipping culture in the US. But you do need to understand it.

Edit: Downvote all you want, people. You don't like what I said, fine... though none of you are telling me how exactly I'm wrong.