r/alcoholism • u/gelidascension • 1d ago

Is this the start?

I guess the question is, how did alcoholism start for you?

I'll make my story short. I'm in my twenties with an history of depression/anxiety. I never was an heavy drinker but this year I've started the habit of drinking alone while very depressed. Only little/moderate amounts (1 or 2 beers and one drink), but I take medications AND Xanax so it doesn't take much to get me tipsy. I never crossed the line of getting full drunk, however much I wanted it. This was a everyday habit for at least 1 month. After that I got told to stop and went on a sober streak of 1 month. It wasn't easy but it was feasible.

Then one day I wake up with incredibly strong cravings. I was shaking. I ended up drinking the usual dose and started back the cycle. Now I do one or two days sober (resisting cravings) and then I drink again, not very much but alas. When I don't drink, I have nausea, headache and vertigo, my hands shake a bit (and people have noticed).

I don't understand if I am developing a problem or if I'm already IN the problem and neck deep in denial... Mainly I'm shocked that I'm having withdrawals with how little I drink. (confirmed it was withdrawals by my doctor). Where do I go from here?

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u/SOmuch2learn 1d ago edited 1d ago

You are in the problem. Drinking alcohol and taking Xanax is unsafe and can kill you.

You need and deserve to get help. What saved me was having support and guidance from people who knew how to treat alcoholism or Alcohol Use Disorder. Did the doctor offer to treat your withdrawal symptoms? You need a safe detox protocol since you are not only abusing alcohol, but Xanax, also. Talk to a doctor about this and be completely honest about what you are doing.

Rehab gave me a great start at the sober, happy life I have today--42 years.

See, also, /r/stopdrinking and /r/alcoholicsanonymous.

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u/gelidascension 1d ago

My doctor told me to just drink herbal teas instead of alcohol. Lol. I think they don't take this seriously because the amounts I take are very small, for now. Thank you for answering by the way

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u/SOmuch2learn 1d ago

What is the matter with him?

Please take care.

I hope you get the help you need and deserve so you can live your best life.