r/Life 1d ago

General Discussion Stuck in mid 30s

Anyone else in their mid 30s and still stuck what they want out of life?

I think I'm still stuck on if I want kids or not. I just haven't found a person to spend the rest of my life with yet.

I'm financial set, I have a house, I have a decent job, I have friends I see every so often... just still haven't found a person to be with I guess, and I'm stuck for what I want with my future.

15 Upvotes

21 comments sorted by

7

u/DJTRANSACTION1 1d ago

I'm 42 now with life long autoimmune disease and failing kidneys. Never had any interest to find my purpose in life. I feel sick every day. But yet, I love life and enjoy everyday of it. I do not need a purpose to enjoy life and will continue to fight to stay alive with strict diet, exercise, and medications regiments while I pursue my passion in music. Finding/seeking purpose in life is useless in my opinion. Waste of time. Why do anyone need a purpose to enjoy living?

2

u/twinjmm 1d ago

You make a good point I suppose. The purpose is just to at least live life the best you can.

7

u/Maleficent_Memory606 1d ago

you have almost of everything what other person of your age wish to have. right person will come on right time.

4

u/Koankey 1d ago

Yeah I was hoping to relate to this post but he's like "I've got money and a house." Nope, we are not the same.

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u/Maleficent_Memory606 1d ago

Yeah. Man. Sadly, we don’t have anything all he has.

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u/twinjmm 1d ago

Haha Sorry... Guess I'm still searching for deeper purpose.

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u/Koankey 1d ago

Well I can relate there. It all feels a little bit pointless sometimes or monotonous. Maybe this is the outcome from our modern society where everything's laid out for us and we don't have real survival struggles.

1

u/Hot_Demand4994 1d ago

I think your base is solid in terms of financials and other platonic relationships to where you can comfortably put yourself in uncomfortable situations to get out there and meet someone. Putting yourself out there is always uncomfortable so maybe your perspective can be that you always have somewhere comfortable to return to (your home and friends) if things ever get overwhelming

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u/Makosjourney 1d ago

Interesting, your narrative call it stuck.

I call it my life goal - to find a lover to build a fulfilling life together.

Everything else is perfect in my life. Definitely don’t want kids.

1

u/twinjmm 1d ago

How have you figured out kids wasn't for you?

Sometimes I think I want them and then other days I don't.

Idk... I can't tell if I see myself in such a traditional role some days.

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u/Makosjourney 1d ago edited 12h ago

I knew when I was 16.

It’s socially constructed scam in my opinion plus some primitive animal instinct.

I don’t like being brainwashed. I also think I am Slightly better than a monkey so I made my decision consciously and strategically at the age of 16.

No regret. All the people I see with kids in my social circle always have a million things to moan. Half of them divorced anyway.

Oh btw, r/regretfulparents is a thing, believe or not.

1

u/Redkarma55 23h ago

If you don’t know if you want kids then you don’t want them.

1

u/Deep_Seas_QA 20h ago

You have to know what you want to get it. Obviously, some things can stumble in to but generally speaking making goals and accomplishing them is the more common path. I felt this way at your age and feel the same 5+ years later.. My advice would be to take action!

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u/SpinachPops23 18h ago

Felt this

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u/Eatdie555 14h ago

I feel you on this one. It's hard for me the find the wife and mother of my future children. I'm iffy on it.

1

u/Wonderful_Formal_804 1d ago

If you don't know what you want in life, what you will get is "I don't know." Possibly forever.

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u/StrikingImportance39 1d ago

I was a year ago. Now I know exactly what I want.

Single woman 25-35. Has no kids. Who does not want kids. Sexually compatible. Introvert. Attractive. 

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u/Original_Estimate_88 1d ago

What does Sexually compatible. Nd Introvert. Attractive means

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u/Verseichnis 1d ago

35 is a tough year. Just get past it, and 40, and you'll be okay.

0

u/Original_Estimate_88 1d ago

I'm early 30s and still trying to get financially stable... I feel like im running out of time, I just want to travel to different states and countries... before I'm old,