r/Assistance • u/rumpeltyltskyn • Oct 03 '24

ADVICE How do I get divorced?

My wife has left me. We have been married for only a little over a year. I’m not working due to health issues so I literally have no money. I have no income and no savings, and completely overwhelmed by what I should do or am supposed to do. Does anyone have any resources that outline things in a simple way? Advice? I’ve tried doing research myself but I just can’t make any sense of anything.

Because I know people will make the assumption, I’m a woman. I’m not a man.

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u/[deleted] Oct 03 '24

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u/rumpeltyltskyn Oct 03 '24

I’m not looking for money advice. I’m looking for advice on how you get divorced. I’m attempting to get on SSDI and I’m currently have things lined up so that I’m not destitute. I have family supporting me.y wife actually never supported me, I supported her until my health issues forced me to stop working and I had to deplete all my savings. Why did you feel the need to be so nasty?

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u/Migraine_Megan Oct 03 '24

From a legal perspective if your family is supporting you now, they will be considered to be your source of income/residence. That is why I couldn't accept help during my divorce, I would have gotten nothing. We owned 2 cars and without a car I wouldn't have been able to get to my doctor appointments, bus service was almost nonexistent there and I couldn't afford to Uber. My car was paid off too. You are "taking" anything from her, marriage means you share assets/debts, divorce requires those to be split. You should get what you are entitled to under state law. (By entitled I don't mean feeling entitled, I mean it as a legal term.)

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u/rumpeltyltskyn Oct 03 '24

By supporting me, I mean they are literally buying me food so I don’t starve. And they’re going to be moving to my house (as roommates) to pay the bills.

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u/Migraine_Megan Oct 03 '24

You REALLY should consult an attorney before having them move in. You don't want to shoot yourself in the foot. All of this will be included in the divorce filings. I had to fill out MANY forms about finances and living costs/expenses, and I didn't even have income. Both parties fill out the same stuff so the mediator and/or judge can look for any discrepancies.

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u/rumpeltyltskyn Oct 03 '24

I mean I need to make sure I’m not homeless. That’s more important to me than anything. I’m not trying to get any money out of this divorce.

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u/Migraine_Megan Oct 03 '24

YOU may not be trying to get anything out of the divorce but she may, especially after she talks to an attorney. Yes, ensuring you are homeless is critical. But if it causes you to be homeless later, it's not better in the long run. The purpose of an attorney is to protect your interests and give you a long-term view of the situation. I cannot overemphasize how important it is.

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u/rumpeltyltskyn Oct 03 '24

I do get what you’re saying. But I have no income, no savings, and no way of having even food let alone a place to live without my family’s help rn.

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u/Migraine_Megan Oct 03 '24

Rarely do people go through divorce proceedings without an attorney and those that I know who did were on really good terms with their ex during the divorce, talked frequently and owned absolutely nothing. And were knowledgeable and capable of filling out all the legal documents without help. But if one party gets a lawyer and the other doesn't, the one without gets steamrolled. You can also try the r/asklegal sub.

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u/rumpeltyltskyn Oct 03 '24

I probably will get one I just will probably have to be particular about which I use.