r/Assistance Mar 26 '23

EMOTIONAL SUPPORT I am so sad

I am just so sad. In short, I saved up all my life and sacrificed everything I could until the age of 38 and opened a restaurant right before COVID hit. Long story short, restaurant is sold at a major loss, life savings gone and I just put up my family home for sale to pay off my debts, will be renting because my credit is shot. Will have to take my autistic son out of his private school and put him in a crappy public school. Marriage took a major hit and I’m not sure if we’ll come out of it ok. I’m out of a job and feel like I can’t work anymore, yet I cannot afford even a week without any income.

I’ve been crying all day and I can’t stop. I’m so sad my heart physically aches. I can’t sleep and cannot hold back my tears and sadness. I know everyone will say stuff like “stay strong” and “it’ll get better” or “there are others that have it worse”, but for me, since the age of 16, I have dedicated every second of every day, made so many sacrifices and suffered so much to get somewhere where I could lead a good life and leave something good for my kids when I’m gone, only to end up with such an outcome. I am destroyed and hurting so much.

I lost hope. I was always positive even when times were hard. I always believed hard work and sacrifices will eventually pay off. I always believed that if I do good I will eventually reap the benefits. I have always tried to be kind, generous, helpful and compassionate with everyone I encountered, no matter who they were. I was religious and believed I will be rewarded for my efforts. I was wrong all along and it really really really hurts to hit the wall and find out all of it was in vain.

I’m not sure what I’m looking for by posting this but I hope to feel even a little better after putting it out there. Thanks for reading me and good luck to everyone out there, life is unfair and cruel.

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u/Chuhaimaster Mar 27 '23

It’s not your fault. Even the hardest working and strongest people can be overcome by random events outside of their control. And you’re still young enough to rebuild your life.

In tough times we need to reach out for help. Don’t be ashamed to receive it. Try and find out all the options for government assistance that are available to you. That’s what they are there for. Remember, we’re all in this together.

Another poster suggested journaling as a way of coping with stress. I think this is sound advice you can implement right away. Whenever you are feeling overcome, take out a notebook and just write what you are feeling. This will help to distance yourself a bit from the situation and process your emotions.

This course on YouTube may also help you to cope with the current situation:

How to Process Your Emotions | Therapy in a Nutshell

I wish you good luck on your journey. You’ve already started on the path by having the courage to write this post. My best wishes to you and your family in these trying times.

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u/DrFredz Mar 27 '23

Thank you so very much for your suggestions and your help my friend, I will undoubtedly look into it. Right now though, I’m struggling to just stay alive and not cry my heart out. God bless you