What would your favorite Touhou character do if they had a conflict with Patchouli Knowledge? Just… think of the worst conflict that can happen.

[u/Gelo68]

[u/Unremarkable_Chance]

gather up as many books as she can carry and fly into the sunset worst case she actually chases her that's when she sets course to the Hakurei shrine and cry "Reimu this evil youkai is chasing me please help!"

[u/RandomPerson295]

Nue and Patchouli:

Her library would be absolutely trashed. Patchouli would be livid as Nue flies around her, taunting her, as she flies away. That’s it I guess. I mean patchouli would probably fight back with some spells but Nue is truly a devious lady lol so idk what would happen

[u/AdvertisingFlashy637]

Worst? Yeah I don't think Patchy is surviving

[u/StarDwellingDude]

there's two Patchouli now

[u/Hakase64 → u/StarDwellingDude]

Yess fellow patchy fan

[u/rolentoamus → u/Hakase64]

Another two, heck yeah

[u/AmJohn2hu]

Spell card duel and I'll be there to watch and get destroyed for being stupid

[u/Gelo68 → u/AmJohn2hu]

Your profile picture is... certainly interesting

[u/AmJohn2hu → u/Gelo68]

Lol, yeah. Someone made a joke about me being a Marisa imposter, so i just chose this weird thing

[u/DayEqual2375 → u/AmJohn2hu]

I always wondered why your pfp was that.

[u/RuukotoPresents]

Iron lung her

[u/uselesscarrot69]

Kick her out of the mansion.

[u/Derk_Mage]

Drink

[u/DrPibIsBack]

Scarlet Devil Mansion: Civil War. Don't know what would spark that rift between Remilia's bestie and her head maid, but I would have to assume if one of them got sent packing it would be Patchouli - Remi can't be making her own tea!

[u/Hesotate]

Hecatia about to fold Patchouli like a piece of origami.

[u/jjtowers753]

Hmmm...well I have a few favorites, lets see how many I can do...

(Also didn't expect pixel art from you. Nice job~)

• Marisa: I think that's just a normal Tuesday...
• Alice: I feel like if these two came into conflict, it would be over a difference in magical philosophy. Like one of them goes down a path the other does NOT agree with, and they get in a fight. I see lots of yelling, an impromptu spellcard fight, and a messy end to a friendship with crying.
• Kanako: At first I wondered how these two even WOULD come into conflict. Like do these two even know each other exist in canon? And then I had the thought: what if the classic Magic vs Science battle between these two? Kanako's been pushing the technology angle pretty hard, trying to get Gensokyo to progress in that direction, while also seeming to not stop to fully consider the potential pitfalls of her plans. Patchouli spends most of her time reading and doesn't move often, and I get the impression she's pretty smart about things. Maybe she hears about some new plan from Kanako and can see how it's likely to play out because she read something about it? And then makes an effort to try and stop her. I....don't know how that conflict might look, though. Does she fly out on her own? Or does she grab everyone she knows, like Remilia, Sakuya, or even Marisa, for backup? Either way, it's likely going to be a battle, and someone might need to step in to pull them apart.
• Ran: This is getting pretty headcanon-y, but I feel like if these two came into conflict it would be through Ran doing a surprise infiltration of the SDM under orders from Yukari to stop Patchouli from delving into some dark arts she must not uncover. Two ways this could play out: 1, Patchouli never even knows Ran was there, but finds herself annoyed with this one particular random fairy maid for always managing to bumble her way into messing up her magical experiments. Or 2, that same fairy maid suddenly reveals herself to be Ran under an illusion, who pins down Patchouli and very carefully informs her that "my master says you are getting too close to a kind of magic you must not uncover, for the sake of Gensokyo's fragile balance" and that she better scrap her research on this subject and switch to a new topic, or she'll be learning first hand what happened to certain PC-98 characters.
• Satori: I'm...really not sure how these two would come into conflict. They're both homebodies who don't really like to leave their homes if they can help it.

[u/Gelo68 → u/jjtowers753]

Peak headcanons :3

[u/jjtowers753 → u/Gelo68]

Dang, you read those fast! But thanks

[u/StarDwellingDude → u/jjtowers753]

patchouli seems to be an advocate of clarke's third law

"you absolute fucking idiots, magic and technology are just two sides of the same coin"

[u/crazycorgiperson → u/jjtowers753]

For Satori, I can think of them getting into an argument about Satori’s over-reliance on her power

[u/MrRaven95]

She would try to scare her. Probably wouldn't work, but dammit she wouldn't give up and would keep trying until Sakuya threw her out of the SDM.

[u/Kr0wN_919 → u/MrRaven95]

O u O

[u/Impossible-Relief-95 → u/MrRaven95]

alas the cuteness is quite the debuff when it comes to scaring people

[u/EllieSmutek]

She would launch a train in Patchouli's face

[u/Kr0wN_919 → u/EllieSmutek]

Yukariiii

[u/Slayer_Liberator]

Worst? she gets a ticket to Hell.

[u/ClintExpress]

They already did and it ended with the Scarlet Mist incident being resolved rather violently.

[u/Nek0Fantasy]

Reimu and Patchouli? Maybe they would just have a danmaku fight to solve the dispute.

[u/EllieSmutek]

She would launch a train in Patchouli's face

[u/Nelrene]

Patchy having a conflict with herself does sound bad. Talking her out of it would clear things up.

[u/Hakase64]

Patchy x Patchy moment

[u/Dangerous_Main7822]

I think suspend her from the mansion or smth? (Remmy)

[u/WhatWhatBeep]

How would a Patche vs Orin fight even go out?
Although funnily enough, Patche is my 4th favorite overall.

[u/Kr0wN_919 → u/WhatWhatBeep]

Patchy would end up real cooked if you get what i mean

[u/LOL__BRO]

Tuesday for Flandre

[u/Turn_AX]

Rinnosuke would be banned from the Library for a bit.

Which would probably be horrifying for him.

[u/Big_Compote_93]

He would try and talk his way out of trouble, then after getting beat up, recover at home thinking that he was probably in the right with whatever the conflict was.

-Rinosuke.

[u/nonexistent_acount]

Drain her magic and disapear with no trace

That or use her body to do unspeakable things that would tarnish her reputation for those who don't know she was being possesed

[u/stalectos]

Kogasa would attempt to jumpscare her, fail, and then get wrecked in comedic fashion. such is the sad fate of all umbrellas.

[u/MIUIGamer]

Someone is sleeping on someone else's gate from now on...

[u/Clean-Celebration21]

Marisa

I mean, isn’t the worst conflict that could happen always happening?

[u/remu-y]

I don't think there will be any conflict, Yukari is too lazy to move☕🗿

[u/Gelo68 → u/remu-y]

I object! According to u/Velochipractor (2024),

"While she often passes herself off as lazy and somewhat silly, Yukari actually is working her ass off behind the scenes to keep Gensokyo in one piece.

Even during her lengthy period of hibernation each year, a dreaming Yukari is subtly performing various forms of maintenance work on the underlying fabric of Gensokyo - meding micro-rifts in the barrier that are too subtle to notice while still under control, but quickly stop being subtle when there's no-one to ensure they stay that way."

Reference: https://www.reddit.com/r/touhou/s/Z8eVvPrLsA

[u/remu-y → u/Gelo68]

From what I know, Yukari rarely involves herself directly (unless it's the only way to achieve her goals) and mostly manipulates other characters into doing certain things.

The thing Yukari cared about is Gensokyo and Patchouli didn't look like someone who would try anything funny. So, their conflict shouldn't be anything serious. Maybe, Yukari just fooling around out of boredom. But, I also doubt it because Yukari looks like someone who would choose sleep rather than doing anything (that's why I said she is lazy).

I don't know, it's just what crossed my mind☕🗿

[u/Gelo68 → u/remu-y]

Makes sense! Thanks for sharing!

[u/candeloro555]

Junko and patchouli fight would only happen if she is helping lunarians and the fight would be like constantine fighting higher demons or spirits

[u/FantasticDog7338]

Yukari would put a portal above and below Patchouli making her to fall forever. Flandre, however, she would go on a riot and get scolded by her sister afterwards.

[u/KitSamaWasTaken]

Shion doesn’t need to move a muscle, her bad luck is probably going to make patchouli fall over while taking a book from the shelf

[u/goldenboxen]

"Artemis turn her sterile for the funny”

[u/Kr0wN_919]

If my fav character had beef with Patchy, Gensokyo would prob have to build Noa's ark reaaaal quick.

[u/santas_delibird]

At worst Kokoro would just start dueling for the title of being the strongest in gensokyo (She isn't). When she loses she will be upset ang Patchy might probably notice her sulking and comfort a tiny bit before going back to what she was doing (Most likely research).

[u/404ERROR4]

An eviction notice

[u/Beginning_Pie_7138]

Remilia- Patchouli, you're FIRED!!!

[u/Artimedias]

patchouli is dropped into the outside world. (Yukari)

[u/Tonta_de_NET11037]

Force her to work outside with her... Or to work out side with her.

Meiling doesn't have a reason to fight Patchi apart from criticizing her like towards mangas

[u/Myr1ca_L1ght]

Kokoro and Patchouli.

Stare off?

[u/Impossible-Relief-95]

run out of the mansion while crying and apologising (her bugs ate book pages)

[u/NeppedCadia]

Eat her or seal her in hell then eat her

[u/fishfiddler07]

Mima de-atomizes her and steals some of her books to laugh at how underdeveloped her magic is

(This is also where Marisa learned her book stealing tendencies from)