r/socialskills • u/Silent_Frosting_442 • 1d ago

Poor social skills Vs misanthropes

I find this sub really useful in terms of improving social skills of all kinds. But what's with the vaguely misanthropic posts? 'i hate small talk', 'i find xyz type of person annoying' etc. What's the point of posting that? You can't be advised out of disliking something and there's a massive difference between 'I hate X's and 'I'm terrible at X but want to get better'. Maybe we need a 2nd sub-Reddit for that stuff.

38 Upvotes

89% Upvoted

12 comments sorted by

48

u/cephalord 1d ago

But what's with the vaguely misanthropic posts? 'i hate small talk', 'i find xyz type of person annoying' etc. What's the point of posting that?

The hard reality is that social interaction (and thus social skills) is a huge facet of human life. Some people are genuinely interested in improving theirs, but others just want to be told that it is totally fine to live antisocially* and grunt at the cashier. They are looking for an echo chamber to justify their decisions.

\And it) is totally fine if you are genuinely happy doing this. If you are only pretending to be happy because you are anxious for social interaction then it is not fine. But if you are genuinely fine with it, you are probably not on this subreddit.

12

u/noahboah 1d ago

But if you are genuinely fine with it, you are probably not on this subreddit.

yup this is the big thing. Anyone that's content with being kinda antisocial and misanthropic is not on here making validation posts. The type of person that is looking for external validation for this behavior knows that, on some level, it is wrong for them/making them unhappy but is too scared to admit that they need to really deconstruct it and change. It's evident by how so many posts and comments have streaks of insecurity under their breath.

7

u/Intelligent-Bee-3888 1d ago

I found this very insightful, thanks.

17

u/Morjixxo 1d ago

No. You can't improve social skills without acknowledging the status of the reality and from where people comes from. Moreover, social skills development is especially needed for those people.

11

u/Silent_Frosting_442 1d ago

Yeah, I agree there. Especially if someone's had a genuinely awful experience in a social situation (people being deliberate arseholes at a party or whatever). But people need to explain exactly what their problem is before people can give effective advice.

-10

u/Crazy_Bar_7176 1d ago

nah, misanthropes win.

19

u/Silent_Frosting_442 1d ago

Don't get me wrong, there are types of people and types of social situations I plain don't like. But a lot of these posts seem more like venting than people wanting advice. 

-17

u/Crazy_Bar_7176 1d ago

ok but like social interaction in general is just 🤮

why would you go out of your way to purposefully interact with shitty human beings?

19

u/Silent_Frosting_442 1d ago

I guess you need to work out who the non-shitty ones are. 

-15

u/Crazy_Bar_7176 1d ago

I think we can all agree we'd rather sit at home in our dark bedrooms talking to LLMs on janitorai

9

u/LMNSTUFF 1d ago

Is this a r/whooosh situation with the downvotes?

5

u/Acceptable_Emu4275 1d ago

And it should be ok for misanthropes to seek advice nonetheless, because not all interactions can be purposefully avoided