As the title says. I am reporting my assailant to Title IX, at his graduate school.

Legally / criminally, it is too late for me to report him because the statute of limitations for “sexual battery” is up. I can, however, still report him via title IX. I am meeting with someone on Thursday and I’m so nervous.

I have a text message from this where I pretty much got a confession, because he said he “wasn’t super clear what you were vs weren’t comfortable with.”

Is title IX worth it? Should I make a report?

I feel bad that it may impact his future, but at the same time he didn’t care about me while he was assaulting me. He made the choice to assault me. And it has altered my life.

Edit: thanks for the support everyone. I just reported his profile and wrote a detailed message to Hinge. Had to relive some of the experience, it was not pleasant. I also went back to our text messages and screenshotted everything and sent it to Hinge. Now, I feel a lot more relieved. But also a bit nervous in case he disputes it and Hinge comes after me. Yeah I know I'm just being paranoid. Maybe Hinge won't even read my report at all. Regardless, I don't think I'll feel happy if he gets banned. I'm just feeling content, now that I know that I've done what I can

I was mindlessly swiping in Hinge. Suddenly I saw my rapist's profile come up, and now I am completely in shock, body feels cold and numb, I am totally paralyzed.

It's already been a year since the incident happened. I was in a relationship with this guy for several years and there were never any red flags. Then, he raped me when we were both drunk. He apologized profusely the morning after. We had many long talks, but I ultimately broke up with him. I went through a lot of therapy and have been in a better place for quite some time.

I don't know what to do now. I really want to report him to Hinge, but don't know if any human will actually read the report, or if I will be believed. I do have evidence, like old text messages of him admitting to rape and us talking about it. But nothing "official" like a police report or hospital records.

I just need strength to write this report and compile all the text message screenshots. It's so hard, but I am sure it will be worth it.

I reported him. I haven’t given them his name yet, only the description of what happened, and she said I have a case. She has to check if I can report him, as I do not go to the same school as him. ( it’s though title IX). I find out if I can report on Monday or Tuesday of next week. I really want to report him, and I have a lot of evidence against him. This is all just so crazy, I’ve never done anything like this before.

I'm 33. As much as I brought it up, I told them I was going to wait for the rape kit to be done to determine my decision on reporting it or not. I said it in a calm tone. They both be like, "YOU WILL RUIN HIS LIFE." to "HE WILL SUE YOU", etc. They are afraid of him coming back at me.

It's awful to hear that they are not supportive of my feelings in this situation. They think sleep sexual assault is not serious because I'm not being forced down and rape.

lol I’ve been posting on here all the time recently, but I have an update. I was just notified that I am able and will be reporting my assailant to his graduate schools title IX office.

I feel so proud of myself, and even if it doesn’t work out in the way I want it to, hopefully he gets the idea that his behavior isn’t something he can get away with. This is the biggest thing I’ve ever done, and I have a lot of evidence.

For one, I have a text message from him that I got after I confronted him about assaulting me. he said “no, I wasn’t super clear what you were comfortable versus uncomfortable with.” which is a confession imo. I have evidence that I went to a sexual assault support group this year. I also have two strong witnesses.

This is all so crazy, but he deserves to be held accountable.

I made a quick decision to report my assailant via Title IX. The emotions are conflicting. The assault happened in July of 2023.

For one, I want justice. I want him to be held accountable for the pain he has caused me. He has made my body an unsafe place to live, and that’s unforgivable. I can’t even touch my own body. I want him to suffer, and he deserves to be held accountable for the forced unconsensual contact he did. He’s made functioning difficult. So, he deserves it.

I don’t know if reporting is worth it because realistically all he did was mostly touching. Mind you I tried to stop him from touching me, but it didn’t work. I know realistically, being groped while I’m attempting to push him off is a horrific thing to experience. But is it worth reporting?

He’s in grad school for psychology, he should not be a psychologist.

I feel a bit silly about this, but part of me feels bad. Why do I have sympathy for the man who caused my PTSD? I shouldn’t. But I do. I don’t want to “ruin” his life, but when he assaulted me he didn’t care about ruining mine. If anyone has insight or advice I’d greatly appreciate it :) thanks!

I don’t really know how reporting works. I’m 16 in the UK. We were in a relationship and I don’t really want to go over every incident Also I don’t really want to go through evidence like i just want to do it once and get it over with Is that possible?

EDIT: the reason I’m worried is because we sent nudes and did stuff on the phone lol

I am just numb and mad at myself. I want to disappear.

My detective and police officer that took my statement believed me. I just didnt give them enough evidence.

Hello

So for some backstory, this summer I reported the sexual assault that happened to me 3 years ago by a family member. It’s been a tough process with me reporting so late and not having done a rape kit or anything like that, but I did a confrontation call with a detective in the room with me. Not much came out of it, he was pretty closed off and defensive the whole time (but was still saying he was sorry), although he kept insisting we talk more about it in person. I asked the detective if that’s an option to get a confession, he said yes (I live in an area where 1 party consent is legal) but I’d basically be on my own. I know it’s dangerous and I’m scared to do it, but it feels like my best chance at getting justice and keeping him from hurting more people (he has other victims besides me already). I’ve been looking online to see if anyone else has had to deal with anything similar to this and I’ve seen nothing. I guess I’m just wondering if you guys have any advice on how to best approach this confrontation? I’m thinking of basically meeting him in a public space with enough privacy for us to really talk about everything in hopes he’ll feel more comfortable admitting everything it me in person. Please help, I don’t want to mess this up

I recent found out that my rapist is being charge with 10 different charges of rape and sexual assault of another girl when she was drunk. I don’t know the girl btw.

I was raped by him in 2019 when I was 17 & he was 18. I was really drunk & he was sober. I filed a police report in 2020 but never followed up because of the emotional strain it would have on my family and myself.

From the context of what I saw in his case summary it looks like what happened to other girl was much more violent and terrible & I feel absolutely terrible abt what happened to her and guilt for not following through on my case.

After seeing that he was being prosecuted by the state, I thought that maybe I should contact that prosecuting attorney & provide a statement. I really want to see him get put away & reprimanded for this, however I no longer live in the state. Additionally, I’m concerned about how much of a commitment it might become if I contacted the prosecutors. I do want to help but I’m just scared about reliving my trauma and I wouldn’t want my family or other people from my high school to know what happened to me.

Sorry this sounds all over the place it’s been really overwhelming and I’m just not sure what to do, because I do want to help but I’m scared, if anyone has some advice.

My SA was on the night of 11/5. I finally went in for an exam and filed a police report on 11/9. I was told by the police officer that he would hand my case over to a detective and they would be in contact with me the following week (it was a Saturday I reported it). However, the following Friday I called because I hadn’t heard anything and it turned out my case was not passed on to a detective. I’ve left the officer two voicemails and still have not heard a single word. I’m so disheartened and upset because I struggled with guilt over pressing charges (my abuser was my ex). To just be left in the dark with literally NO word makes me feel like nobody gives a shit.

Worse yet, when I brought this up with my therapist, she literally said “well it’s the holiday season and people are going on vacation and all that.” Um… what? So the holidays are more important than my assault? Are you fucking kidding me?!

Has anyone else dealt with this? I’m going to reach out to my advocate on Monday to see if they can help me because this is just ridiculous and makes me feel like I shouldn’t have even bothered pressing charges.

About 7 months ago I was SA'ed (¿raped?) by the guy(now 17 then 16) I (now 18 then 17) was dating at the time. Immediately after it happened I felt angry and dirty and wanted to go to the police but I didn't know how I would explain to my mom calling from a police station and wasn't sure even where to go so instead I went home and just tried to wash off the feeling and ignore it. Now 7 months later I finally decided to tell adults about what happened. Originally I was just going to tell a trusted teacher but it quickly became larger than that. After spending a few hours at the police station and retelling the explicit story a few times today I just keep wishing I had gone to the police right after and hate myself for not doing so. It was also a case of fight, flight, or freeze AND I ENDED UP FREEZING which after talking to the police has made me start to feel like I should've just said "no" like I wanted to, but also I know that I couldn't get those words to leave my mouth, and that it was instinct not me. I'm slightly relieved to have finally told adults since 7 months on emotional turmoil hasn't been fantastic but I know giving this report was only the beginning of the process, and my ex is rather unstable and I'm somewhat afraid of what's to come. Anyway advice or reassurance would be appreciated but I really just needed to talk about today.

Am I able to just make a statement without an investigation? Will he be told about it? If he disagrees is he able to get rid of it?

In 2012 I was sexually assaulted by someone I dated briefly. I was maybe 20 or 21, in college. He told me that he was a lawyer.

Quick background: he was a huge liar I later found out. I found out he was unemployed at the time, he lied about his age (claimed to be in his early 20’s but was in his early 30’s), had lied about his upbringing (I found his Wikipedia page…what normal person has a Wikipedia page?? And he deleted it shortly after I confronted him).

I went to his place expecting to go to the zoo, but he got on top of me, laid on my stomach, and held me there. I said no, then after realizing he wouldn’t stop I told him to get a condom hoping I would have enough time to jump up and run. But he did not. He forcibly removed my hand from where I was blocking him and assaulted me. He stopped when he noticed I wasn’t into it and I disassociated. He jumped up.

After the assault my brain reframed what happened?? Idk. I just fully disassociated, we went to the zoo. He tried to talk with me the days after, but I would not engage. But I had it in my mind that “I don’t want to talk with him anymore because he lied about XYZ” like I didn’t realize I was raped??

In 2021, after finally getting therapy for other things, this memory unlocked. And I felt sick because I did not realize it was a rape at the time. How did my brain do that. It freaked me out. I processed it.

What pisses me off and why I want to speak up now is because I want for him to pay. After the assault, he stalked me for years. When I still lived in that state, he’d show up randomly at my jobs. I’d block his number and he would get another number to call me. He’s find me on ALL social media platforms and add me/message me. Blackplanet, Facebook, etc. I was afraid he’d find me on here. But now I don’t care. Last time he messaged me was on Facebook (I blocked 2 of his profiles before) in 2021. He teaches at a university now, and he is traveling the world. I was so angry. He is just living his life. And he makes me sick. He always messages me like it’s nothing, wanting to catch up and asking if I’m single. I’m obviously married now based on my profiles. SMH.

In the state that the assault happened in there is no longer a statute of limitations. I am highly considering pursuing this. I know that there may be a high chance that it’s not taken anywhere or I’ll lose, but I really just want to speak up for myself. For so long I stayed quiet about things, which has caused me so much depression and anxiety over the years. I want for my voice to be heard. And I want to show my daughter that no matter what we should never be silenced.

as the title says. I’m reporting him to title IX but my anxiety is so high, and I haven’t even started the process yet. I’m not telling my family about this because they haven’t been supportive of me. My therapist is on board with it and is very supportive of me.

I just don’t know if I can do it. it feels like me reporting may make my healing process go down, but at the same time I desperately want justice for what he did. ever since deciding to report, I’ve been more triggered. this is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do and it’s very overwhelming. I’m worried because the process hasn’t even started and I’m already a wreck.

I have a lot of evidence against him, including two strong witnesses, proof of attendance for an SA support group, and a message from him pretty much admitting to it.

I am wanting to think about it like this - I’m going into 2025 taking my voice back from him. I am putting myself first. what he did was illegal and a crime, and it shouldn’t have happened. I am the one who is living the consequences of his actions, and this is incredibly unfair. I know deep down that I do want to report, but I’m scared. does anyone have advice? thanks :)

I’ve been hesitating for a long time and it makes me in pain. I feel like I have to report, because I suspect the rapist is a predator. He is the organizer of that series of social activities, so I guess there might be more victims similar to me. The scary thing is that I searched similar activities and found he is in several of them. And everyone in that organization doesn’t know his true colors. I feel panicked when I think about it. Besides this, I’m also pretty sad and angry about what happened to me, and feel like I want to report.

However, he knows my address, not very detailed but at least the building number. I’m really afraid of being revenged, and I have serious anxiety and a little bit persecutory delusion, so I know I’ll be anxious if I report. I still want to live in this city in the future, and I don’t want to face danger since I think he’s abusive.

I’m in a dilemma. It’s so tough. I think about it every day. If I don’t report, I feel I have to do sth and become uneasy. But if I report, I think I’ll be terrified and anxious.

The detective has managed to get a warrant to record a phone call with him. Any advice on how to approach the call and just how to maintain my sanity while doing it?

For context, the test was done too late so I’m relying heavily on the call to both confirm it happened and confirm that there was no consent. I was drunk and asleep….

I’m worried about how I’ll do the call without letting my emotions get the best of me and also while making sure he opens up and speaks about it.

Sex Trafficking by Police

I (40sF) was arrested in west Tennessee(for resisting arrest) after running out of gas on the interstate and never committed a crime. Multiple cars and at least half a dozen male officers, state troopers AND police surrounded me. They never offered help in the 25 minutes I begged for help. I was thrown into a local jail for four days where I was drugged and raped multiple times. Afterwards I was involuntarily committed to a state mental institution where I was refused a rape test and intentionally misdiagnosed to discredit anything I might say. My question is when would my statute of limitations begin running for police brutality and misconduct and for medical malpractice by the TN state funded mental hospital? Limitations for both in Tennessee are one year. When does the clock start and end? I’m having a hard time finding a civil rights lawyer despite videos and audio. It’s happening to men and women in west Tennessee. Look at the recent dateline in that area.

He recently moved to Australia. A few days ago, he told me that he went out clubbing with some new friends. They took cocaine and MDMA. He doesn't think he was that messed up. But the next thing he remembers is waking up in his new friend's bed - naked. The friend was very open about the fact they had been fooling around for hours.

My friend doesn't remember this. The sex, kissing him - he fully blacked out.

He spoke to a hotline and they said that if he doesn't remember consenting, then its SA. But what if he did consent whilst off his face? I am NOT victim blaming. Im just worried about what the police will say. He wants to report it. Im scared that it wont have the outcome he wants. Especially because if they do a drug test for roofies, they could find the other stuff he took. And then theres the fact his "friend" had taken all that too. If they were both under the influence of drugs, how does SA and being able to consent come out in a court of law? Could they argue that my friend was also taking advantage?

I will support him in whatever he chooses to do going forward. I just want him to be prepared.

I'm reporting my assailant to Title IX at his graduate school. I'm nervous because what if he hires a lawyer maybe it won't work out for me. But realistically, I don't know how a lawyer could prove that he didn't assault me. If the lawyer states that he didn't know I was uncomfortable because he failed to ask me for consent, that's proof he assaulted me. Is there a way he could somehow win? I'm scared. He touched me and groped me without consent, could a lawyer somehow say what he did wasn't assault? I also was actively attempting to push him off. I want justice.

I have a fair amount of evidence, including a text message from him saying "I wasn't super clear what you were comfortable versus uncomfortable with." I have proof that I went to a SA support group this year, and I have a report from Bumble that banned him from their platform. I also have texts to my friend saying “I’m still struggling with the (his name) situation.” I have two strong witnesses. But I'm so scared. He has a good reputation and everyone loves him. He's charismatic and is good at lying to people to make it seem like he's a good person. He works with children and wants to be a psychologist. Someone please help me not overthink and fear for the worst.

Im contemplating If I should report it to the police or go to title nine at college. I heard some people saying the weight has lifted off their chest after reporting, however I hear it is very triggering and re-traumatizing process to recount the details of what happened. You basically have to tell polices every detail of where he touched you and you'd have to mentioned your private body party which is dehumanizing and humiliating. I don't understand how reporting helps you heal better if not making you feel worse. i'm still healing from SA and planning to speak to a new therapist about it. i've been having psychical symptoms whenever I recall the memories or touch the specific parts of my body. how can you not get triggered when you talk about terrible event that happened to you? How could you be better after reporting it to the police when you have to recount details when you dont want to recall?

hi, f19 here! long story short I talked to my therapist about my uncle raping me in 2022 and he had to make a report :/ (this was in april) and in July I got contacted by a detective. my mom didn’t know about this and he came to my house asking if I was home, (I was at work) afterwards he called me and wanted me to go to the station later in the week. when I got home my mom was so worried and asked me a million questions and i basically had to tell her what happened. she was mad and disappointed at me, that I talked to my therapist about it instead of her. my parents wanted me to lie to the detective about what happened and were so angry when I told them I wasn’t going to lie (we’re south asian, they wanted to protect him) it was so rough. but eventually they came around I guess and they “support” me I guess? Idk. anyways I got a call from victim services a few days ago saying my case was send to the district attorney and they could press charges on him, they wanted to ask if I had to testify how I would feel abt it etc etc. I’m so anxious about this and haven’t told my parents yet. (they REFUSE to press charges and were guilt tripping me into not if there was a chance too but thankfully I’m 19 lol) sooo yeah,,, I don’t know when they’ll get back to me about it but my god I’m so anxious about it. my uncle is an “important” person in our family/extended family so to say,, so yeah, super anxious but kinda happy this is happening :’) I’m in Cali btw, what can I expect next? if anyone has been through court

I know it may seem like a stupid question ask. I was assaulted three years ago by my ex. I have pictures for evidence and he admitted to doing it. A year later I got back together with him because I was young and dumb and thought that I was in the wrong. I thought that I was wrong to accuse him of raping me because we were in a relationship together so that must mean that consent didn’t need to be given no matter what just because we were together. We were making out and it was getting pretty heated and then I ended up passing out. I have disorders that make me seize or pass out. He still continued what he did and when I woke up, he finished and I was covered in bite marks and bruises. I had a substance on my clothing as well. It’s been years now since then and I don’t even live in the same state anymore, but I’m always afraid every day that he’s going to do that to somebody else. I’m afraid of the backlash that I would get for making a police report, but nobody knows and everybody thought that I was crazy at the time when he was doing these things to me. I feel very alone and that friend group left me not knowing what he did. I wasn’t a perfect person at the time either. I was extremely mentally ill (still am but doing much better) and was in the middle of getting treatment, but I still don’t believe that I deserved to be raped. Am I still able to report it even though it was years ago and even though I’m not living in the same state that happened anymore? We were both 19 at the time.

for reference, i live in michigan.

a 14/15 year old girl at my little sister's school supposedly is pregnant by a 22 year old man. they're clearly dating by looking at their social media. they tried to get married in a different state (minimum age for marriage is 18 in my state) but i don't know if it was successful. either way, she's dropped out of high school and changed her last name to his on instagram. everyone in my community knows about it, but it doesn't seem like anyone's reported it to authorities. i want to do something but i have no evidence besides what's obvious from social media/talking to them, i don't know these people personally, etc. what do i do?

not so lond ago some so called "friends" made ai nudes of me and my friend, they were defending themself saying it was a joke, but it was not so funny to me, considering it was spread around... we want to sue them but we dont have the pictures, what we do have is their voice memos and calls where they admitted to making them MULTIPLE times, im wondering what we can do, keep in mind im freshly 18, and my cousin is 17, so she is underage in our country, we are both girls, and our "friends" are 26yo and 20yo, the 20yo female is in a relationship with 26yo male, the male made those and was sending them to the female, she spread them around, after like a week they started saying they didnt do it, what can we do, please help🙏??