r/problemgambling • u/Comfortable_Safe_704 • 1d ago
Trouble distracting myself
It's been 1 week since I acknowledged that I had a problem and decided to seek help. Thankfully I haven't had urges to gamble since that day. What I'm really struggling with is trying to distract myself from all the thoughts.
I'm constitantly thinking about all the money I lost, all the debt I'm in, how much of an idiot I am for putting myself in this situation. I wake up every morning so low because a part of me wishes that it was all a bad dream but then realizes it's not. I know I should give myself grace and be kind to myself but it's just hard. I can't help it. The thoughts just flood my head like a virus. It won't go away. I'm constantly on the verge of breaking out in tears from being so overwhelmed.
People say distraction is really important in the recovery process. I've tried to go out and do things to distract myself but still can't escape the thoughts.
People also say to pick up a hobby. But that's easier said than done. To actually find something I enjoy and can get fixated in. Maybe video games? I used to play video games so it could be something I get back into and enjoy. But it also feels like a waste of time.
I just feel lost. What a doozy this has all been.
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u/Exciting_Repeat2021 22h ago
Itās hard, Iām battling the same thing right now too. Cancelled my sports betting account a week ago just to find myself at a in land casino today losing $550 USD. In some where way the relapse is helping my recovery. After gambling for 25 years, all I can do is start from Day 1 again and know Iām that much closer to kicking this addition. Does anyone ever go out on their last time being a win? I doubt it. Most importantly for me is not filling one addiction with another bad addition. When I say bad addition, Iām talking about one that consumes your financial security. One that you spend money, but donāt get anything in return (i.e. social media platforms where you support a content creator). I think as a species, there are addictions, but there can be positive ones such as exercising. Be kind to yourself, I know Iām trying to be. This is one of the worst battles Iāve ever gone through but I know when my time on earth is done, I donāt want this gambling addiction to have a hold of my soul because I donāt think I would of learned completely during my time here. I donāt think this is the way to higher consciousness. Also I need to sacrifice for the better good and for the people that need me. I need to be better and better is not going into financial ruin for a distraction
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u/Comfortable_Safe_704 20h ago
I've had a few big wins and every time I would tell myself "I'll cash out. This will cover a good chunk of debt and I'll never gamble again". I've hit withdraw and cancel too many times to count. I was convinced that I can make more each time to cover more of my losses. But I always end up digging myself a bigger hole. It wasn't till one night where I lost everything and maxed out everything, that I realized I had to stop. I just hope for others it doesn't get to that point like I did for them to realize that they need to stop.
This battle is hard, it's dark, it's scary. We just have to stay strong for ourselves and get through these hard days. Cause deep down we know that if we get rid of gambling from our lives for good, life will be better. Trust me, it sure don't feel it right now, but one day it will.
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u/jjdeer22 23h ago
Videos games can be good because they are engaging and require you to focus your thoughts on the game. Go out in public, hiking, to a store. Being out can also be a good distraction
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u/Comfortable_Safe_704 21h ago
I went on a hike today with my friend to try and distract myself but it didn't work. I couldn't stop the thoughts. Had to hold back tears almost the entire time. It was rough
But some days will be worse than others. I know it'll get better eventually, can't wait till it does.
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u/jjdeer22 1h ago
Good on you for trying. Maybe try something that requires you to stimulate your mind as well. Keep trying til you find what works for you
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u/Every-Apricot3322 23h ago
Thats my situation right now too, i was trying video games but i got into the same thought that i was losing time so i started an social media account of something i liked and i been pretty busy since then, so keep looking for something u might like to try and never gave a chance, i will keep looking for more things for me aswell, we gotta keep busy bro or our thoughts will drain u, but the good thing is that slowly this thoughts will go away, it happened with me before but i relapsed again this week, so the cycle will repeat and i know i will suffer a lot now until i get a little bit more on track again but we need to lock in and i think a new year is a really good motivation to change things
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u/Comfortable_Safe_704 20h ago
Lock in. New year, you got this. I'm glad you found something that makes you happy, stick with it. I hope I can find the same for me. Cause ya these thoughts are draining and I'm just so mentally exhausted.
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u/dymondhandsy 21h ago
There is so much more to life than sitting in front of a wheel, a racetrack, a TV screen with numbers being drawn, a poker table etc. Why did we get caught up in this? As they say in GA some people may determine the why and others may never understand why and that is ok as long as we continue to not gamble.
This is like being sick and having surgery and worrying about your health and having obsessive thoughts about being physically ill. Slowly as time goes by as you heal these consuming thoughts will lessen but it is entirely healthy to recognize how difficult and consuming these thoughts can be at first. It is part of being human.
You've got this. One day at a time!
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u/Comfortable_Safe_704 20h ago
Yes exactly. It's going to be hard for a while, it'll be overwhelming and sad and it's going to feel like there's no escaping these feelings/thoughts. The wounds feel deep but I know with time it'll heal.
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u/BetOnProgress 730 days 8h ago
Well looks like some of the distractions youāve tried are not working. Why do you keep thinking about it? I feel like you need closure to forgive yourself and understand what made you gamble and all the force at play. Because itās not only on you, gambling is a weapon of mass destruction. Then you need a plan to look forward to the positive stuff.
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u/laugh_hack 2564 days 1d ago
Video games work for me, I got a Steam Deck and play the games on my TV with a controller. Steam has tons of older games for dirt cheap, and they keep me entertained. Also streaming TV shows that have a lot of episodes. It sort of gives you something to do when there's nothing to do; without having to think about things too much. Like I'd get restless and would just say to myself "okay I'll watch the next episode" and then I could calm down and not worry that I didn't have an activity to do.
It just takes time. Our dopamine receptors got totally blown-out from the gambling. They will reset back to normal, where watching a show or playing a video game doesn't feel like everything is in slow motion. At first I had to do two things at once, like play a match-three game on my phone while watching TV, or scroll Reddit.
You're doing great, congratulations on one week! Stay away from further gambling and things get better. Those negative ruminations are usually a trick the addiction uses to try to get you to feel beaten-down and considering gambling again. Don't fall for it. Life is so much better on the other side. I am hoping the best for you.