r/confidence • u/Hopeful-Mud5536 • 3d ago

I want to react quickly on unwanted comments!!!

Anyone else also has this struggle??? Sometimes people pisses you off but you can't immediate think of any good way to shut them down. Then you keep thinking about it for days, while you are eating, walking, and anything else. It's basically just bothering you so much.

Like one day, this person judged my outfit in the office by saying "Casual Friday, not pajamas day"
In my mind I was like b*tch it's not your business but didn't know what to say actually.

How would you respond to sarcastic sh*t like that? And how would you quickly react to similar situations?

6 Upvotes

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3

u/wearealllegends 3d ago

If you don't know what to say in the moment, just laugh it off. When you laugh it off and seem nonplussed there's no positive reinforcement for the bullies, it means you are not affected. You dgaf.

1

u/[deleted] 3d ago

[deleted]

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u/ez2tock2me 3d ago

I usually look people dead in their eyes and express “Mmmmm.” As I roll my eyes and walk away. As if to say “Go away.” without using words.

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u/Hopeful-Mud5536 1d ago

I love this body language! Silence is louder than ever!!!

1

u/ez2tock2me 1d ago

A younger female friend of mine taught me this, when we finally became friends and she saw how people treated me. I didn’t have it in me to fight back, so she stepped up and voluntarily started training me.

I had no idea what she was doing, until one day, out of nowhere, my confidence came out of me. Surprised me and shocked other people. I still didn’t have it in me to fight, but other people thought I did and wouldn’t push the issue further.

My friend heard about some of my incidents and congratulated me.

She explained a few things to me and thats when I found out what she had secretly done.

So now, I Pay It Forward.

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u/w4rf4c3x 2d ago

"Opinions are like assholes.. " - *walks away*

*narrow eyebrows judgingly* "mmmmm.. .riiiiight.. anyway"

*LAUGH* - "Anyyyway.. "

For some scenarios, have some "canned" material. You know, things you encounter often. For example.. I'm a man. In our friend group, there's this new guy.. who's been really.. dramatic. He's like a male version of a bully from "Mean Girls". So.. for him I've thought up some very specific one-liners for when he goes into his Mean Girl mode. Never had to do this before.. like EVER. Everyone in my life is really chill. But this guy.. weird AF.

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u/i0xie 1d ago

I either laugh, completely/obviously ignore what they said (even if I made eye contact), or if it's around other people and obviously rude, ask them to repeat it and not reply. I've actually gotten a few apologies for rude comments doing the last two. I don't find being rude back very classy, and it adds fuel to a fire I really don't care about.