r/confidence 8d ago

Turning Optimism to Confidence

What is the difference between confidence and optimism of the future?

Here’s some context: I (25M) decided to pivot careers early on. Two years ago, I was ahead of the curve and scored a fairly high position purely through hard work and being smarter than the last guy. I was liked, appreciated, had a pretty comfortable income and a very pretty picture of the future was painted for me of future promotions by upper management. For lack of a better term, I was being groomed for leadership down the line in a quickly growing small business. About 3 colleagues of mine had very private and personal talks about turning back. They said I was too young and I should explore other careers before I get stuck like they did. I took that to heart and it hit me like a truck. I don’t think their words convinced me but I remembered the things I was passionate about and what I wanted to do before. So, basically I threw away the two years of work prior, and quit and for what it’s worth I 100% know that was the right move.

That was kind of a hard reset. Moved back with my parents and had a slow year compared to what I was used to. Felt like a bum. But things are starting to pick up again. While I am not confident in my self right now. Im making a lot of changes. I’m losing weight, greatly improving hygiene and grooming, honing my hobbies, and most importantly, in school again. As awesome as these things are, I have nothing to show for it. Went from being ahead of the pack to being a bartender living with the parents. That’s a weight on the confidence for sure.

So basically I feel like Bitcoin in 2009. Give me some time and I know I’ll be amazing. It’s not about comparing myself to others. I just mean I have this faith and optimism in myself. I know I will be exactly where the teenage me dreamt of being in 3-4 years time. But as of right now, I’m kind of a nobody. I lack confidence and almost ashamed of where I am at. People can tell I lack confidence right now. I’m nervous even around old friends of mine. I’ve received fairly constructive comments on my demeanor. Does anyone have any advice on how I can translate that optimism into confidence now?

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u/Few_Ebb3175 5d ago

Hey there, first of all, I just want to say—it takes guts to make the kind of pivot you did. Most people would’ve stayed comfortable, even if it meant feeling stuck, so give yourself credit for listening to your gut and choosing a path that aligns with who you are.

The difference between optimism and confidence comes down to this: optimism is about believing things will get better in the future; confidence is about knowing you have what it takes to make it happen right now.

It sounds like you already have that inner belief in your potential, which is a huge part of the battle. The next step is proving to yourself, day by day, that you can trust yourself to follow through. Confidence is built through action—small, consistent wins that show you’re capable.

Here’s something that might help:

  1. Celebrate small wins daily. Whether it’s crushing a workout, nailing a shift, or just keeping your focus in school, take a moment to recognize the progress you’re making. Confidence isn’t built in leaps; it’s built in steps.

  2. Speak to yourself like you’d speak to a friend. If a friend came to you with your story, you wouldn’t call them a “nobody.” You’d probably tell them how impressive it is that they’re rebuilding their life with purpose. Talk to yourself with that same kindness.

  3. Set short-term goals. It’s amazing that you’re thinking big (and I can totally see the Bitcoin analogy), but confidence grows faster when you focus on near-term wins. What’s one thing you can accomplish in the next week? The next month? Crush those, and your confidence will catch up to your optimism.

  4. Practice being present. Confidence isn’t just about where you’re headed; it’s about how you show up in the moment. When you’re around old friends or new people, focus on what you can offer them right now—your humor, insight, or just being a good listener.

Lastly, remember that you’re not “starting over.” Everything you’ve done before—those two years of hard work, the lessons from your colleagues, the courage to pivot—are assets you’re carrying with you. You’re not at zero; you’re building on a strong foundation.

Keep at it. Teenage-you would already be proud of the moves you’ve made. Confidence is just the byproduct of consistently showing up for yourself. You’re on the right path.

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u/damonky23 4d ago

Hey! Just wanted to say thanks! Weird how a stranger on the internet can be quite the pick up in confidence. Like you said, focusing on small wins and going to keep moving forward. I really appreciate the advice. It did not fall on deaf ears and 100% will be repeating to myself regularly. Thank you.