r/StupidFood 2d ago

Pretentious AF This 3 Leaf Caesar Salad

Post image

Dressing made table-side. Slothed into three leaves, with a crouton crust bread. I think I was being punk’d in this steakhouse tonight.

2.0k Upvotes

137 comments sorted by

352

u/FigaroNeptune 2d ago

$15 please

140

u/peppermintmeow 2d ago

14

u/RunningonGin0323 2d ago

Lmao. The exact gif that came to mind

3

u/GilbertoPakalolo 18h ago

THE WOOOOO-OOOOORST!

36

u/Fluffy-Pomegranate-8 1d ago

Fifteen bucks, little man. Put that shit in my hand. If that money doesn't show then you owe me owe me owe

11

u/BirdmanEagleson 1d ago

it's jungle luuuve ow-e-owe-o

3

u/bigbangbilly 18h ago

Too much green for too little green

2

u/cutiebrieee 1d ago

This was at a steakhouse and was brought out table-side so I would assume it cost more lol

288

u/Easy_Money343 2d ago

Was it Caesar's last lettuce?

69

u/Ccaves0127 2d ago

Et tu, Bruté?

2

u/depraved-dreamer 1d ago

Et tu, Buttérhead?

117

u/Global_Criticism3178 2d ago

This is how you say "f-you for eating here" in food form.

3

u/GustavoFromAsdf 21h ago

"If you're stupid enough to eat here, you're stupid enough to pay"

143

u/TerrorKingA 2d ago

I’m pretty sure this is how the original Caesar Salad was, OP.

The restaurant is hitting you with the “uhm actually” as they take your money lol

44

u/Unkuni_ 1d ago

What kind of idiot put 3 lettuce leaves on a plate with some sauce and thought, "Yup, that's a proper amount of salad"?

41

u/This_User_Said 1d ago

"" The Caesar salad was invented on July 4, 1924 by Italian chef Cesare Cardini in Tijuana, Mexico: Cardini created the salad when his restaurant was busy and he was short on ingredients. He put together what he had on hand, which included lettuce, olive oil, raw egg, croutons, Parmesan cheese, and Worcestershire sauce. The salad was originally served tableside, and that tradition continues at the original restaurant. ""

That's what I figured. Not like they have the same commercialization as we do now so they might not had the ingredients as plentiful then as we do.

33

u/ZippyDan 1d ago

Where does it say "only three leaves"?

16

u/This_User_Said 1d ago

When it said "1920's". It's not like they had a pallet of this in a deep cooler or anything. Not saying it wasn't available either. I'm just saying it took a lot to go from farm to table.

In a restaurant industry paired with markets, you're bound to be short. Especially when commercialization of produce wasn't as great as today. So I was just answering the "Yup, that's a proper amount of salad" rather than "not dicing the salad"

I'd imagine dicing it prehand would be disrespectful to the grower to not show how great the leaves are, but that's just me pulling a theory out of my ass.

-43

u/YouSmeel 2d ago

If you think anyone is here for any type of reasoning or facts, even one that is snarkily agreeing with them, you're completely out of touch

42

u/meowmeowgiggle 2d ago

Just because it's "traditional" doesn't mean it belongs, unannounced, in modern cuisine and dining.

30

u/Sungodatemychildren 2d ago

Caesar salad is modern cuisine, it was invented in the 1920s. The shitty thing about OPs meal is the paltry amount and the terrible excuse for a crouton.

-35

u/meowmeowgiggle 2d ago

In what world do you live where "modern cuisine" is a hundred years old??

Modern cuisine is influenced by classical cuisine, that's why we still have Caesar salads.

16

u/Sungodatemychildren 2d ago

In the world where dishes like Caesars salad can be found on the menus of tons of restaurants without it being "retro" or whatever. If I see Caesar salad on a menu without additions, I expect dressed lettuce and croutons, aka a non-shitty version of what OP got.

Would you consider corn dogs, Reuben sandwiches, Vichyssoise, Banh Mi, or Chicago deep dish to be non-modern foods?

-27

u/meowmeowgiggle 2d ago

To quote myself, since I guess you missed it:

Modern cuisine is influenced by classical cuisine, that's why we still have Caesar salads.

The traditional presentation evolves and becomes modern. If it doesn't evolve, it is colloquially "classic."

Everything you listed has indeed been modernized to the point that if you made any of them traditionally, from scratch, they would be palatably unrecognizable to most people (notably for reduced salt and sugar). Nevermind the flavor differences in all of those foods as we have dramatically modified plant crops and dramatically fattened/otherwise modified livestock.

What the OP was given was a traditional Caesar salad. However, even when listed as such, the commoner expects the lettuce chopped. Were I making the menu, I would include "whole-leaf romaine" in some way in the description.

It's not about "akshually" and all about operating a restaurant that the customer can interact with as smoothly as possible and have proper expectations of what they're ordering. (Personally I think descriptions are far more important than names. I skip names, go straight for "WTF is it?" If there's no description, they're forcing me to make the wait staff answer extra dumb questions that could be printed on the menu.)

2

u/depraved-dreamer 1d ago

I'm trying to determine if you're trolling but the modern era was long ago

-11

u/meowmeowgiggle 1d ago

Modern literally means new or recent past.

"Modern art" and "Post-modern art" are indeed older than what is typically "modern," but that's an error in naming.

"Modern Cuisine" is an older book title, applicable at the time of its writing.

Modern cuisine, as it is today, is heavily influenced by items that were "modern" at the time of their introductory popularity, and have been further modernized to today's palates.

1

u/depraved-dreamer 1d ago

Actually, the modern era is stratified across all fields. Sorry if that offends you.

-2

u/meowmeowgiggle 1d ago

It's really weird that you think I would be offended by a conversation of categorization. That's weird. Do you get offended by stuff like that? I think it's weird that you're offended that I said traditional Caesar salad is not "modern."

There is no such thing as "modern cuisine" as a category of food. There is Modernist cuisine, which is, put flippantly, "gadgets and gastronomy." At best, you can find a couple blogs that conflate "Modern" and "Modernist."

"Modern cuisine" is a phrase composed of "modern" (of the present or recent past) and "cuisine" (foods). It is not some actual culinary category, and I invite you to provide anything to refute that.

Thus, modern cuisine expects that a "Caesar salad" will be chopped, and it should be noted in a menu if it will be unchopped, as it is not something that is expected or, by the looks of this comment section, tolerated.

There's no offense if you disagree. There's just nothing to support your argument that hundred year old recipes are "modern."

2

u/depraved-dreamer 1d ago

The phrase you're looking for is contemporary.

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19

u/ionised 2d ago

I believe the original is made with four (could be wrong about this).

That said, the bread is certainly a choice.

12

u/Ok-Fox1262 2d ago

I hope they gave you some little Caesars to cut it up with.

23

u/UserNameHere1939 2d ago

No it is not, a salad anyway.

51

u/Ezgru 2d ago

I told them maybe call it reconstructed cuz I watched it break a man at the table next to me

15

u/Ezgru 2d ago

“A bundle of Caesar” is a better name

-10

u/YouSmeel 2d ago

Do you often goto mid tier/ higher end restaurants expecting high quantities of food? If this is a trash their bar then I'd totally expect a trough full of food

6

u/Boobles008 1d ago

This doesn't look like a fine dining dish at all.

6

u/meowmeowgiggle 2d ago

I don't think they were complaining about the size so much as describing what it looks like: a bundle of salad.

3

u/YouSmeel 2d ago

I mean looking at the bundle of romaine leaves, I struggle to describe it differently

35

u/apprehensive-look-02 2d ago edited 2d ago

This would seriously annoy me lol. They don’t even cut the lettuce

15

u/HTTRWarrior 2d ago

But that's how traditional Ceasar salad is served...

4

u/zombizle1 1d ago

and it traditionally cost 20 cents probably

6

u/festeziooo 2d ago

The rye chip crouton is wild.

21

u/Dependent_Title_1370 2d ago

I would have returned this and refused to pay.

11

u/Ezgru 2d ago

I realize slathered was the word I wanted but autocorrect wrote slothed before I could fix 😑

3

u/RoyalEagle0408 1d ago

“Slothed” kind of works.

4

u/Trap-Dad 2d ago

Sus bread

4

u/Norci 2d ago

Was it an appetizer or "main" dish? Cuz as appetizer , kinda w/e.

7

u/Ezgru 2d ago

Main. The other salads were as expected. So this really threw it off

3

u/flepke 2d ago

Caesar got murdered all over again

3

u/National_Box1153 2d ago

If that’s how it is done traditionally, I can see why he was stabbed.

3

u/Frostbiten92 2d ago

I can't tell if it's a fancy restaurant or a shitty restaurant.

2

u/GalacticCmdr 19h ago

Why not both?

7

u/Imsomedude-dude 2d ago

If this ain’t some bullshit I don’t know what is

2

u/Diligent-Mongoose-43 2d ago

you can ask the chef to come into your table and throw the entire salads to him and shout its just a salad dude..

2

u/Koshekuta 2d ago

Don’t wanna get full on the salad.

2

u/Cheeseburger-BoBandy 2d ago

That’ll be $12.99

2

u/Emotional_Break5648 2d ago

Caesar didn't get stabbed for this

2

u/depp-fsrv 2d ago

I wonder how much this was, my guess is $20?

3

u/Ezgru 1d ago

$25 - close :/ for a main salad that feels like bunny snacks, made me glad I wasn’t paying for it.

2

u/depp-fsrv 1d ago

Over the top presentation, reminds me of the restaurant scene of the Randall Park movie 'Always be my Maybe'.

2

u/peppermintmeow 2d ago

I hope they at least pulled your hair with that righteous fucking

2

u/WilloowUfgood 2d ago

Looks high end.

2

u/99999999999999999989 1d ago

If it was any more than 15¢, you got ripped off. And yes that accounts for the prep and delivery to the customer.

1

u/MrZephy 1d ago

15 cents?

2

u/flossaby23 1d ago

Fancy.

2

u/girdedloins 1d ago

Waaaay back in the day, in a small university town in either Idaho or Eastern WA, we went into some type of "upscale" restaurant. I got four entire Romaine leaves, a little brick of Parm, and two big dried pieces of baguette, with a ramekin of dressing on the side. Quantity wise, I guess I got more than you, but damn was that one completely stupid salad. At least your three leaves got tossed w the dressing, I guess??

2

u/MookieWook3700 1d ago

I hope someone gets aggressive with the owner

2

u/CaptBogBot2 1d ago

There's barely any cheese on it, either...

2

u/alextbrito 1d ago

This is actually the leftovers of Cesar's Salad, he didnt like It

2

u/crystalsouleatr 21h ago

Why am I reminded of that scene in The Menu where Margot says, "They're making fun of you, you know that right?" And her date insists it's "part of the art" or whatever lol

1

u/Ezgru 19h ago

Bahahah oh my god yes

4

u/The_Powers 2d ago

"Haute cuisine" is French for "less food for more money".

Genius really.

0

u/meowmeowgiggle 2d ago

That's not less, at all. Chopped up that's a very decent amount.

7

u/PreOpTransCentaur 2d ago

3 romaine greens is not a decent amount of anything but bullshit.

-2

u/meowmeowgiggle 1d ago

Have you ever chopped up romaine leaves?

That's literally it. Three romaine leaves.

A "side salad" is 1 - 1 1/2

1

u/The_Powers 1d ago

I'm sure it'll look like a 'decent amount' if you zoomed in too.

But that's barely a rabbit's fart of a salad.

9

u/firl21 2d ago

Jokes on OP. This is the original Cesar salad where it was invented how to make

19

u/SadLaser 2d ago

I thought the issue was the amount and the single somewhat poorly made crouton. This salad is easily twice the size with very nice looking croutons.

8

u/Sungodatemychildren 2d ago

The amount and the terrible "crouton" is what bothers me about this

6

u/HiGround8108 2d ago

I would say that even that is better than what OP posted.

4

u/Kaneshadow 1d ago

The joke's on OP how exactly? That guy used roughly 3x as much lettuce

2

u/ZippyDan 1d ago

That has like 5 full-sized leaves whereas OP's photo has like 3 half leaves.  Maybe OP's photo is misleading.

1

u/firl21 1d ago

Could be 5 could be 3 depending on the restaurant

2

u/hatemylifer 1d ago

That salad looks nothing like what OP posted, I don’t think anybody would complain about the one you posted. The one in the video has several full leave of Romain, the one OP posted looks like three half pieces

2

u/Ezgru 2d ago

Makes a lot more sense now 💀😂

1

u/Tidalwave64 1d ago

The presentation of this “salad” looks horrible

3

u/Ezgru 1d ago

Truly. I told my partner to snap a pic because I was in shock that’s how it was presented. I moved the crouton on top bc the lettuce was covering it so it somehow looked even worse than this pic. I’m tempted to go again just to video the whole process and presentation lmao

1

u/chrissie_watkins 1d ago

I hate salad, so this would kinda be ideal.

2

u/Ezgru 1d ago

Presentation aside, it was delicious

1

u/fistmelupus 1d ago

its stupid to expect a salad to come exactly how you want it. tell them, ask the server... now 3 big romaine leaves is a little light in my opinion, but its a salad not the entree. was the dressing good? how was that toasted crouton? that's why they make salad forks and knives. or were you concerned why you had so many utensils? so you learned av little lesson about asking about how the salad comes. take the hit. how was the steak? you're taking about SALAD man....SALAD? not the beef that i love and die for? we're talking about salad...

1

u/OptiKnob 1d ago

Don't get too full... dinner's coming!

1

u/Kryds 1d ago

It's just lazy.

1

u/CoolSwim1776 1d ago

Yah that is infuriating. The unmitigated gall to serve that.

1

u/UnusuallyAWombat 6h ago

This is what I eat when I’ve had a long day at work and need to eat a salad…

1

u/KarmicIvy 4h ago

i work the salad station at a small business pizza place. it's nothing glamorous by any stretch of the imagination, but if i can make good looking caesars, so can this fancy schmancy restaurant.

1

u/OkSpinach5268 2d ago

Lmao! I literally involuntarily said fuck you, out loud, directed to the restaurant, when I saw that pic.

1

u/gracelesspsychonaut 2d ago

Lmao and a big rye cracker 😅

2

u/meowmeowgiggle 2d ago

I kind of dig it, if it was available on a byo salad bar, but "it's a bold move, cotton" to serve this as a menu item with a straight face.

-44

u/[deleted] 2d ago edited 2d ago

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15

u/Ezgru 2d ago

Aww little girl you’ve edited your comment 3x so far! The knife was used to cut the first bite, wild concept.

-34

u/[deleted] 2d ago edited 2d ago

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26

u/ResponsibilityOne227 2d ago

Imagine getting this upset over a post about a salad

-21

u/[deleted] 2d ago edited 2d ago

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15

u/[deleted] 2d ago

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6

u/sexualism 2d ago

Shit was a manic episode🤣🤣😭😭

9

u/ResponsibilityOne227 2d ago

Sure. Definitely not because you immediately insulted the person that’s barely in the frame. Bait used to be believable man.

3

u/Lopsided-Egg-8322 2d ago

have you ever seen s leaf of lettuce like that? they be big, cutting it smaller, easier to eat, you know, it ain't rocket science ffs lmao..

4

u/MalodorousBeav 2d ago

How does one get this pressed about something they suspect to be false? Log off champ.

2

u/meowmeowgiggle 2d ago

Hooooooly shit you used the word "hamplanet"??????

You know that says so much more about you than anyone else, right? 😂