r/REDDITORSINRECOVERY • u/StrongholdMuzinaki • 3d ago
The holidays suck :(
I’m 2 years sober and I’d have to say pretty much everything about my life has gotten better. Except Christmas. God damn I hate these family gatherings where everyone is drinking/getting drunk and I’m just white knuckling my way through it. I. Would. Love. A drink right now. I’m not gonna do it, but it’s really fucking with me how in those moments of craving the past 2 years of work just feel like something that’s standing in the way of having a drink right now.
Anyways if there’s anyone who’s feeling the same thing, I’m standing here in solidarity with you. We got this.
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u/rudolf_the_red 3d ago
you do have this and the moment is passing.
i've been known to leave gatherings and go to a meeting. that helped get me temporarily centered and no one misses me when i'm gone an hour and a half. i eventually learned to just avoid gatherings and eventually people when i wasn't in the place to deal with them. it's ok. you've got this.
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u/saradil25 3d ago
U got this, fam. You're an adult and can spend ur time how u want. Is it an option to go to the function earlier and leave earlier, before folks get drunk? Maybe celebrate with fewer or different people on a different day?
When I struggle, I try to think of things I'm grateful for. Maybe volunteer or do something to help those less fortunate and gain perspective. Good luck
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u/standsure 2d ago
It gets easier.
I mean that's not so helpful when you're in the thick of things tho'.
At two I was still working out what I liked sober, what worked for me (and what didn't).
Ten years on I'm pretty restrictive about how I spend my holiday season. And who I spend it with. There's a bunch of (very) unsober family that can go suck whatever they like, just far away from me.
It's my time for sheltering whatever waifs and strays need a good meal. It really does get better, the more you fine tune how to support and protect yourself in stressful times. Especially holidays, especially from family of origin.
My big weakness is still mince tarts tho'. I would kill to find a reliable brandy free source of those bad boys.
You're doing so great. I'm proud of you.
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u/EMHemingway1899 2d ago
Not being like my parents was an additional incentive for me to not drink
Hang in there my friend
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u/Mustard-cutt-r 2d ago
I get it. This year I’ve felt odd cravings. Not bad ones, and I am not going to drink, but I definitely notice it. Stay committed, this too will pass.
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u/IlliterateJedi 2d ago
This just popped into my feed - Did ya make it through the holiday sober?
The one good thing is that every subsequent year gets easier. Eventually your memories of Christmas will just be sober Christmases. And being sober at the holidays just becomes old hat.
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u/StrongholdMuzinaki 2d ago
I did! I made it through! it’s funny though. I remember it being somehow easier (in a way) at the very beginning. Like being sober was so novel and I was looking at everything with new eyes. It was kind of a high in and of itself. Now I feel like I’m sobering up all over again lol. It is getting easier in a lot of ways despite that though. My psyche is a million times stronger and I actually have some coping skills now. I trust myself that I’ll keep it together. Thanks for asking and checking in :) <3
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u/Nanerpoodin 3d ago
I had a non-alcoholic beer for the first time today. It wasn't bad. I was surprised it actually kind of satisfied the craving. Didn't make it any easier to be around drunk people, but I bring my own entertainment for that.
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u/[deleted] 3d ago
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