r/AmIOverreacting • u/bouchraa06 • 1d ago
👥 friendship AIO for being cold towards my “best friend” after she missed my bday
Yesterday was my (F) 18th birthday and I hosted a dinner/party for about 20 friends of mine. A few couldn’t come because of being in other countries for the end of the year celebrations but my so called “best friend” didn’t attend even though she was in the same city and lives 7 minutes (10 if there’s traffic) away from where I live and hosted the party.
Three days before the party she asked me to send her the guest list and I did, she reacted by saying that those weren’t particularly her friends. I thought nothing of it because she has a different friend group from mine, but she’s not hostile with my friends, they’re just not friends.
Two days before the party she asked me if I would be mad if she didn’t attend my party and I thought she was joking because she does joke a lot in a weird humor.
The day before the party she said that she wouldn’t attend because she needed to study and didn’t feel like socializing with people who weren’t her friends (note that she knew everybody and was a little bit friends with two + me so she for sure wouldn’t have been alone and I would’ve made sure of it and she knows it).
I sent her the invite over a month ago, she was the first I sent it to, before the full guest list was even done because to me it was just obvious that she’d attend. She had time to organize her studying to miss ONE night of it and I still gave her the option to come for only part of the night. I also told her that we only celebrate our 18th once and she knew it was an important moment for me.
The day of, she called me during lunch and said that she was gonna be home at 6 (so two hours before the dinner) and that she could either come to mine or I go to her and we see each other for 30 minutes and she gives me my birthday gift. I was just annoyed at her not wanting to take 30 minutes at night but didn’t mind taking it before the party so I told her I wasn’t gonna be at home and I was gonna be at a friend’s before the party. I didn’t talk to her for the rest of the day and through the party, I was still hoping that she’d come.
She texted me in the morning and I have been acting cold towards her whereas she acts as if nothing happened. She asked me to go to dinner with her TONIGHT and I told her I couldn’t and gave her the excuse of a friend who came from another city for my bday being at home. I also know that a few days ago she hung out with my ex best friend (who’s a part of her current group of friends) for a few hours, meaning that at that moment her studying didn’t matter that much.
Am I overreacting?
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u/Ilickpussncrack 1d ago
Paragraphs!! you're in or have gone past highschool this was taught to you
YOR, it was only a bday and she explained why she wasn't there, she clearly still wants to be friend and try to make up by going to dinner with you. trust me there are worst things (specially in this sub) that a friend has to do to show that they don't want to be your friend than missing your BDAY.
TLDR:
Yesterday was my (F) 18th birthday, and I hosted a dinner for friends. My "best friend" didn’t attend, even though she lives nearby. She asked for the guest list, said those weren’t her friends, then later told me she wouldn’t come because she needed to study and didn’t want to socialize with people she wasn’t close with. I offered her the option to come for just 30 minutes, but she still didn’t show up. The next day, she texted me like nothing happened and asked me to dinner, but I declined because I had a friend visiting for my birthday. Am I overreacting?
5
u/Flamsterina 1d ago edited 1d ago
Have you ever heard of paragraphs? This is a Berlin Wall of text and word vomit.
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u/Mysticfluffy95 1d ago
Blows me away that people can’t make out simple English if the spaces aren’t right lol. You don’t have paragraphs and all of a sudden people can’t read. Give me a break
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u/BlindUmpBob 1d ago
Not that we can't, we choose not to. It's bot worth the effort, just because OP couldn't hit the down key twice.
It's not hard...see?
0
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u/Mysticfluffy95 1d ago
Like bruh it’s just reading. Acting like it’s translating a foreign language
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u/Weekly-Aide9825 1d ago
read all this totally fine, and don’t think out over reacting, take ur space from her, a good friend shows up for you even when they are busy
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u/Chilling_Storm 1d ago
This is impossible to read, please put into paragraphs and and TLDR. Remember, we don't need ALL the details - just the basics